Luigi Jokes

when I kiss a guy who has a mustache I'll close my eyes and pretend he's either Mario or Luigi, depending on his height

Princess: U alone? Luigi: Ya. Mario lookin 4 u underwater. P: lol. wut? L: ya idk. meet up? P: sure. go-karts L: k i'll bring bananas

Poor Luigi when his parents were all, "This is Mario, we also call him 'Super Mario'. And this Luigi, we also call him 'Player 2'.

Mario and Luigi fight to the death, in "The Plunger Games".

Zelda is the name of the PRINCESS, the guy in green who saves her is named Luigi, idiots.

Princess Peach: Something's different. You seem taller. Luigi wearing Mario's red overalls: No, nothing is different. It'sa me, Mario.

The Italian Beach (NSFW) Mario and Luigi, two Italians recently out of jail, see each other at a bar. ""Luigi! You friggin guy! how are ya, i heard you just got outa jail,"" Mario drunkenly exclaimed. ""Yeahs, i was ina the jail for robbery, how about you Mario?"" slurred Luigi. ""well,"" began mario, shaking his head sadly ""i was a-layin on da beach."" Luigi was obviously surprised and said""but Mario, you cant git arrested for a-laying on da beach!"" Mario looked up from his drink and said gr…

So much for being invincible. It was a warm, sunny day as Mario was relaxing in the cafe area of a favorite restaurant of his, enjoying a cappucino. Toad strolls up to him and says ""Mario, look at this!"" He pulls a Starman out of his pocket and continues, ""As long as you hold this, nothing can hurt you!"" Taken aback but nonetheless pleasantly surprised by the gift, Mario rushes home to show Princess Peach. Before entering his home however, Mario hears moans coming from an open window near th…

Italian honeymoon Sophia just got married, and being a traditional Italian was still a virgin. On her wedding night, staying at her mother's house, she was nervous. But mother reassured her. ""Don't worry, Sophia. Luigi's a good man. Go upstairs, and he'll take care of you."" So up she went. When she got upstairs, Luigi took off his shirt and exposed his hairy chest. Sophia ran downstairs to her mother and says, ""Mama, Mama, Luigi's got a big hairy chest."" ""Don't worry, Sophia"", says the mot…

Wreck it Ralph 2 is confirmed Disney has plans expanding on the characters who got little screen time, plus using more video game characters for its movie. For this, they need to talk to one of the biggest video game companies in the world. Disney walks up to Nintendo and proposes a deal. ""So, Nintendo, what will it take for us to use Mario and Luigi in our movie?"" Nintendo pauses, and purses it's lips, thinking for a moment. ""60 billion dollars?"" asks Nintendo. Disney straps on a poker face…

Mario and Luigi According to stories told by both fans and Nintendo most would assume that Mario would get Peach and Luigi would get Daisy right? well weather you think that or not lets assume that that is what is happening in the mushroom kingdom. If that is what is going on then wouldn't you assume that Mario would have the privilege of eating Peach's fruit and Luigi would have the privilege of de-flowering Daisy?

Super... Smash... Brothers! To celebrate the return of the celebrated fighters Mewtwo, Lucas, and Roy, Peach decided to throw a large, extravagant party at her castle, but she requested everyone bring something for the party. First, Mario and Luigi pull up in their Mario Karts, pulling out their boxes of mushroom-covered pizza. Then, Link and Toon Link arrive, pulling into the train station and dragging a significant supply of fireworks. A duo of Arwings swoop down, and Fox and Falco jump out of…

Two illiterate Italian fishermen are out one day. After fishing for awhile Marco says to Luigi hey Luigi, this is a really good spot. Maybe tomorrow we come back here catch alotta fish. But don't tell nobody where! We betta marka the spot! So Luigi says I'm a gonna marka the spot. later on the way home, Marco says dida you marka the spot like I tolla you? Luigi says Yes, I put a X inna the bottom ofa the boat! Marco says Estupidda! What iffa we donna getta the same boatta tomorrow?

St Peter and heaven joke perfect for Feb. 2nd Three Italians, Luigi, Mario and Giuseppe, go to heaven. Saint Peter stops them at the gate and tells them they have to take a test before they can enter heaven. ""You must tell me about Easter."" St. Peter says. Luigi steps up. (All speaking in the typical Italians accent) ""I know all about Easter. That's when this big a fat a guy brings toys to all kids"" St. Peter's says ""not even close off to purgatory for you"" Mario steps up. ""Mario knows al…

Luigi's Fruit Shop Maria went to Luigi's fruit and vegetable shop every week. She walked in on this particular day and said, 'Hello, Luigi. I woulda lika two kilos of tomatoes pleasa.' 'Ah, Maria, so sorry I have no tomatoes today.' 'Luigi, don'ta joka with me. You know that I always buy my tomatoes from you. Just give me my tomatoes, Luigi.' 'Maria, I told you, I have no tomatoes today.' 'Luigi, I'm in a hurry, please give me two kilos of tomatoes.' 'Maria, it's like this. How do you say ""carr…

Luigi the Fisherman No one in this town could catch any fish except this one little old Italian man. The game warden asked Luigi how he did it. Luigi said, ""Comma down tomorrow...we go fish"" Once they got to the middle of the lake Luigi took out a stick of dynamite, lit it, and threw it in the water. After the explosion fish started floating to the top of the water He took out a net and started picking up the best ones. ""Luigi!"" said the game warden, ""You know that's illegal!"" ""I'm going …

Golf and vino 70 year old Luigi goes to his doctor for an annual check-up. The doctor is amazed at what good shape Luigi is in and asks, 'How do you stay in such great physical condition?' I'm Italian and a golfer' says Luigi, 'and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways. I have a glass of vino, and all is well.' 'Well,' says the doctor, 'I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your Dad when he died?' 'Who…

""Do you know what this is?"" Chang says, proudly showing off his new boat to his neighbor, Luigi. ""You a-bet I do,"" says Luigi. ""It's a junk."" Chang is incensed. ""How dare you insult my boat like that!?""

After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride Virginia, Luigi stopped by his old barbershop in Cleveland to say hello to his friends. Giovanni said, ""Hey Luigi, how wassah de treepa?"" Luigi said, ""Everytinga wassah perfecto except for da traina ride down."" ""Whadda you mean, Luigi?"" asked Giovanni."" Well, we boarda da train at Granna Central Station. My beautiful Virginia, she packa bigga basket a food. She broughta vino, some nice cigars for me, and we were looking a fo…

So the Germans were having a hard time against the entrenches Italians in WW1 Lt Rommel has an idea: "Hey, a lot of Italians are named Luigi. I say we try calling out 'hey, Luigi', and when they stick their head out to answer, we shoot them." It was decided that it was worth a try so early the next morning the Germans launch their new "offensive". A German soldier called out, "Hey, Luigi!". An Italian soldier stuck his head out and replied, "Ya?" BANG! This went on for a while. "Hey, Luigi…

So Mario is talking to Luigi. "So I breka up with tha princess last night. But I told her, it's a not you, it's a me! Mario!"

The Italians are fighting Americans in the trenches An American gets the idea to yell the name Luigi, and being a common Italian name when someone hears their name and looks up, they shoot him. "Hey, Luigi!" An Italian looks up and says "Yeah?" BANG After the Americans do this a few times, the Italians try it for themselves. They decide to yell the name John, being a common American name. "Hey-a, John!" An American shouts back "Hey! Is that you Luigi?" The Italian looks up "Yeah, itsa…

A young recently immigranted Italian couple Maria and Luigi fall in love and get married. They're sort of poor and spend the honeymoon night at her mama and papa's house. Maria's a nervous virgin and Mama's busy cooking spaghetti and has to try to calm Maria down and talk her into going upstairs to her husband. She finally does, and Luigi is sitting on the bed and gives her a long passionate look. Maria gets scared and runs downstairs, saying "Mama, Mama he's a got a such a strange look on his …

Luigi asks his brother what that Nintendo avatar is called Mario says “It’s a Mii.”

The Italians are fighting Americans in the trenches An American gets the idea to yell the name Luigi