Pirate Jokes

So a pirate walks into a bar... A pirate walks into a bar with a helm firmly attached to his crotch. The bartender sees this and asks,""Doesn't that hurt?"" The Pirate replies, ""ARRR, It's driving me nuts.""

Since we're still doing Pirate Jokes... What's the Pirates favorite letter? Ya think it be the Arrrr, but it's really the C.

A pirate joke kind of day. What do pirates and pimps have in common? They both say ""YO HO!"" and walk with a limp!

Pirate Nuts Pirate walks into a bar. Bartender says ""You know you got a steering wheel stickinn out of your pants?"" ""Aye! It's drivin me nutts.""

Don't mind me, just another pirate joke passing though What's a pirate's favorite letter? You'd think it was arr, but actually it's the sea.

What do you call a pirate who intentionally sets a fire at sea? An arrrrrsonist. Thank you. I'll be here all week.

Inspired by the pirate joke that didn't end in ""ARRRR."" A grizzled old pirate stumps into a bar with a pegleg, an eyepatch, a hook, a parrot on his shoulder, the whole kit. The bartender notices that he had a ship's wheel jutting from the front of his pants. The old pirate swings himself onto a barstool and orders a whiskey. After a few minutes, the bartender can't help himself any longer. He finally asks, ""I get the pegleg, the eyepatch, the hook, even the parrot, but what's with the wheel?"…

What does it cost for a pirate to get his ear pierced? A buck-an-ear

Yet *another* pirate joke A young boy dressed as a pirate for Halloween and was happily trick-or-treating when he came upon this one house. He rang the bell and an older woman opened the door. ""Oh my,"" she said. ""What a fearsome pirate. But tell me, please, where are your buccaneers?"" The little boy sighed and said, ""Under my buccin' hat, lady. Where are your buccin' eyes?""

My favorite pirate joke. The dread pirate Blackbeard walks into a bar with the huge, unwieldy mass of a ship's steering wheel sticking out of his britches. He carefully and slowly sidles up to the bar and says ""Barrrkeep! Fetch me some grog and a shot of rum!"" The bartender, cowering, says, ""Sir, it looks very uncomfortable, you can barely sit down. Do you realize you have a steering wheel sticking out of your pants?"" Blackbeard's face changes. His nostrils flare. His eyes go wild. Everyone …

A pirate walks into a bar ... ... and the bird on his shoulder is saying ""Pieces of Nine. Pieces of Nine"". It was a parroty error.

One pirate says to the other, ""Ey, you want some grog?"" And the other says, ""I made tea!""

The best pirate joke... ...is the one you don't have to tell. Sincerely, a ninja.

If you like non ARRRRR-punchlined pirate jokes that take place in bars..... A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel stuck down the front of his pants. It looks very uncomfortable and he is walking very laboriously. The bartender, noticing the odd situation asks: ""Hey, why do you have a steering wheel stuck down the front of your pants?"" to which the pirate replies: ""ARRRR, I don't know but it's driving me nuts!""

Official Pirate Week! 19/5-25/5 It seems as if we're doing pirates, so we might as well have an official pirate week. Normal jokes are ok, but also lots of Pirate themed ones. Arrrbitrary Piratejokes!

What is a pirate's favorite letter? Ya think it's the R, but it be the C!

Well if we're doing pirate jokes, here's one a classmate dropped on us: What's a pirate's favorite movie about the Iranian Hostage Crisis? Arrrrrrrrrgo.

What's a pirate's favorite letter? AYEE ya thought it be ARRR but it be the 'C'!

A rabbi, a priest and an imam... ... are walking in the forest and find a large amount of golden coins. They decide to split the treasure in 3 equal parts, but they also decide to share their parts with their respective communities. -I'll draw a circle on the ground, and throw the coins it the air. What falls in it is for me, what falls outside of it is for my community, says the priest. -I'll draw a line on the ground, says the imam, and throw the coins in the air. What falls exactly on it is f…

Another pirate joke. A pirate walks in to a bar. Before the pirate sits down, the bartender notices that the pirate has a steering wheel attached to the front of his pants. The bartender says to the pirate, ""I have to ask about that steering wheel on your pants!"" And the pirate says ""Oh, me wife gave it to me, she drives me nuts!""

Another Pirate Joke that doesn't end in ARRR *Ask someone (using your best pirate voice)* ""WHAT BE A PIRATE'S FAVOURITE LETTER!?"" *they respond (hopefully*): ""ARRR?"" ""AYE, YOU'D THINK SO. BUT 'TIS THE C!""

A Spanish pirate walks into a bar... [OC] A Spanish pirate walks into a bar, and he appears down in the dumps. The bartender notices this and asks, ""Aye, what'll ye be havin'?"" ""Agua, por favor."" ""Hm, whatever floats yer boat, lad."" ""...Si.""

Cute Pirate Joke What is a pirate's favorite fast food restaurant? Well, you might think that it'd be Arrrrby's, but they are actually quite fond of Long John Silvers.

How Black Tooth McPhee Lost His Eye It was a typical evening at the pub by the bay when a young man walks in and spots old Black Tooth McPhee sitting in a corner. The yound man walks up to the old pirate and gives him a rowdy hi ho and says, ""Ah McPhee, you're not looking so good since the last time I saw ye. What happened to ye Mate?"" McPhee, replies in a raspy voice, ""Ye see Lad, I lost me leg when I fell overboard and a shark took it off below the knee. And I lost me hand in a card game th…

A pirate walks into a bar.. ..and the bartender says, ""Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"" ""What do you mean?"" the pirate replies, ""I'm fine."" The bartender says, ""But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."" ""Well,"" says the pirate, ""We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."" ""Yeah,"" says the bartender, ""But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both h…