Italy Jokes

Did you hear ISIS is in Italy now? Italian ISIS... I'll show myself out.

It's raining in Italy That's why it has the shape of a boot and not a flip flop.

Why is Italy shaped like a boot? Because you can't fit that much sh*t in a shoe

A NY city guide and a black man are talking... The black man says ""I have seen China town,Little italy and Greek town but where is 'Little Africa'"" The New York City guide responds collectively ""You're in the wrong city, Detroit is a few hundred miles west""

Three men want make phone call from Hell to remind to their relatives about its harsh conditions Their Nationalities were American, Italian and Iraqi. So they decide to go to Devil who is the boss. So the American made a call and the Devil made him to pay 100 USD, then an Italian made a call and the Devil made him to pay 10 Euros on fact that Italy is less developed than that of USA. LASTLY an Iraqi made a call and the Devil made him to pay a cent. Both the American and Italian complain as it is…

A German, an Italian, an American, and a Mexican are sitting on a roof... celebrating after a hard days work. The German pulls out a bottle of beer, takes a long chug and throws the rest of the bottle off the roof. The Italian asks, ""Why did you waste that?"" The German replies, ""Don't worry, we have so much beer in Germany."" The Italian then pulls out a bottle of wine, takes a long chug and throws the rest off the roof. The German asks, ""Why would you do that?"" The Italian replies, ""Don't…

What do you call a gay doctor who went to college in France, married an Irishwoman and practiced medicine in Italy? A Fag

Recent documents have shown Mussolini was one of biofuels' first advocates, using them extensively in Italy, even for public transport He made the trains run on thyme

Italy changes law to make all markets give unsold food to super needy keep it going

An American anthropology professor is lecturing on how to recognize the dominant features of a culture. ""It's quite simple,"" she says. ""Just look for the things to which, or for which, people make great sacrifices. In medieval Italy, look at how much money the people gave to the Catholic Church in their devotion to Jesus and the Virgin Mary. In pre-Columbian Mexico, look at the sacifice of humans on the Aztec altars of their gods. Even in modern India, look at the outrageous burdens placed on…

A waiter in Italy translated this joke into perfect English for me and my family A French woman, a German woman, and an Italian woman are having lunch together. One woman begins complaining that she does everything around the house. She does the dishes, the laundry, the cooking, everything! She is fed up and the other two women are too. They decide to stop doing the chores and have lunch again next week. After a week goes by, they meet up for lunch again. The French woman begins talking about wh…

Three men stop for lunch on a construction site while working on the 10th floor. The first one, Chang from China says ""I am so bored with what I have been having for lunch. If I have noodles again for lunch, I am going to jump off the building"" And he opens his lunch to find noodles, and promptly jumps off the from the 10th floor to his death. Mario from Italy says ""I agree - I am so sick of pasta for lunch, if I find my lunch is pasta I will jump off the building and kill myself"" He opens h…

Ethnic humor . . . Q: What is the national bird of Italy? A: The fly.

Did you hear Italy is joining forces with ISIS? They think the world needs more Italian ISIS

you dont know Jack Schitt!? NSFW(language) You Don't Know Jack Schitt? Jack Schitt You Don't Know Jack Schitt? Author Unknown Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says, ""You don't know Jack Schitt."" Now you can intellectually handle the situation. Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, a partner of Kneedeep &. Schitt Inc. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced 6 chi…

you dont know Jack Schitt!? NSFW (language) You Don't Know Jack Schitt? Jack Schitt You Don't Know Jack Schitt? Author Unknown Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says, ""You don't know Jack Schitt."" Now you can intellectually handle the situation. Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, a partner of Kneedeep &. Schitt Inc. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced 6 ch…

A man walks into a nightclub with a beautiful girl on his arm. The show begins and the comedian comes out for his first show of the evening. The comedian says ""A man walks into a nightclub with a beautiful girl on his arm. The show begins and the comedian comes out for his second show of the evening.. The show begins and the comedian says ""A man walks into a nightclub with a beautiful girl on his arm"". Just then a man in the front row stands up and says ""I think I've heard this before"". The…

Italy in the 2014 FIFA world cup What's the difference between Italy and a tea bag? Ones in a cup

France and Italy declare war on each other, who wins? Neither, Italy switches sides and France surrenders, both lose

International airline acronyms Italy ALITALIA = Always Late In The Air, Late In Arrival ALITALIA = Arrived Late In Turin, And Luggage In Australia Britain BOAC = Better on a camel Belgium SABENA = Such A Bloody Experience Never Again Pakistan PIA = Please, Inform Allah Yugoslavia JAT = Joke About Time Pacific Western Airlines PWA = Pray While Aloft PWA = Please Wait Awhile Airlines Trans World Airlines = Teeney Weeny Airlines.

What's the best selling soft drink in Italy? Dr. Pepe

Explanation of the crisis in Italy & Greece. A small town in Italy twinned with a similar town in Greece. The Mayor of the Greek town visited the Italian town. When he saw the palatial mansion belonging to the Italian mayor he wondered how he could afford such a house. The Italian said; ""You see that bridge over there? The EU gave us a grant to build a two-lane bridge, but by building a single lane bridge with traffic lights at either end this house could be built"". Soon after, the Italian…

Of all the cars in Italy... Mussolini's is the fascist.

Rome wasn't built in a day... But it was built in Italy!!

Japanese Vacation A japanese man comes home to Tokyo from a trip in Italy. A friend finds him in the street and asks: ""How was the trip? Did you enjoy it?"" He responds: ""I don't know, haven't checked the camera roll yet.""