America Jokes

Old USSR joke about free speech In America you have freedom of speech. You can stand in front of the White House and say: ""Reagan Sucks."

TIL America has more museums than Starbucks and McDonald's combined. Starbucks and McDonald's have a combined total of 0 museums.

I hate how everyone keeps saying America is the stupidest country in the world... You know what I think? Europe is the stupidest country in the world.

Trump signs executive order banning the sale of pre-shredded cheese He wants to make America Grate Again.

two foreigners in america are applying for citizenship They're lined up outside the Citizenship and immigration office

A Chinese walks into a bar... A Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg.

America elected Donald Trump And we're going toupée for it

Looks like Trump is keeping up Michelle's ideals of getting America fit again. One day in office and he has thousands of people getting up and going out for walks on this beautiful Saturday morning.

Who would survive if Trump and Clinton both were stranded on a island? America

You know those slices of American cheese you get from the supermarket? You're not going to be able to buy those anymore. Since Trump is going to make America grate again

I had a thought the other day Losing 15 pounds sounds a lot better in America than in England.

What do you get when you cross Captain America with The Incredible Hulk? A star-spangled banner

Mario and Luigi were on the bus while visiting America So Mario says to Luigi

Once there was 3 chinese people who wanted to go to America.

Two Arab brothers meet in Lebanon They have a conversation in which they agree that they are both quite wealthy and that to lead better lives they should move to America with their families.

America sure is having some bad luck It's almost like it was built on an ancient Indian burial ground.

So excited for the season finale of America I hope there's another season though...

I finally figured out Donald Trump You have to ruin America first if you want to make it great AGAIN.

If Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton gets in a car crash who will survive? America.

Well America actually did it

Why does America use Mexicans to pick our oranges? As we saw on Tuesday

Think of all the new jobs Trump will bring to America: Wall builders

Shredded cheese has officially been banned in grocery stores in the US. Trump will make America grate again.

11/9 The day America terrorized themselves.

Obama used the race card. Hillary used the woman card. America used the Trump card.