Facebook Jokes

Mark Zuckerberg stole Facebook from my friend, Craig Facebook

sorry I had to unfriend you on Facebook after you accepted my Facebook friend request one second after I sent it to you at 3 in the morning

Hey, people "liking" Walmart on Facebook - you OK?

LinkedIn would be richer than Facebook if they charged $200 to never get another email from LinkedIn.

This girl on Facebook is dying her hair blonde tonight. Omg she's nervous, you guys.

Facebook is a good reminder that I went to school with idiots.

Twitter: your jokes suck Instagram: your face sucks Snapchat: your life sucks Facebook: your family misses you and is also racist

Remember when AOL was the shit? Then it sucked. Myspace was the shit. Then sucked. Facebook was the shit. Then sucked. Twitter is the shit!

How to stop checking someone's Facebook page: 1. Delete your Facebook profile 2. Break your phone 3. Give away your laptop 4. Die

Mark Zuckerberg came up with the idea for Facebook when he was at a party & a racist uncle wrote a bible quote on a painting then poked him

Don't tell me you're coming to my party on facebook then go for something better last minute ugh have fun at "the wake" or whatever

Thank you Facebook for putting everyone's Facebook page link on their Facebook page. I would have never found their page without it.

How to stop Facebook Live and Marketplace notifications: 1) Open Facebook app 2) Go to Settings 3) Throw your phone into a river

The best part about Facebook is never having to wonder what your acquaintance's baby is doing all day everyday day.

Please take the smartphone away from your pets, they are spamming your Facebook with selfies.

Hell hath no fury like woman tagged in a Facebook photo that makes her look fat.

Screw you, targeted Facebook ad for adult diapers! *thinks about not having to pause TV or games* *orders some*

Kate who dumped me at junior school now wants me to like her interior decorating Facebook page. How the tables have turned Kate.

So when a couple gets engaged on Facebook for April Fools it's okay to comment "hahaha" but the rest of the year it's rude??

I know Tinder is gonna help me meet the right person because all it takes is a mutual like of Virgin America on Facebook.

*opens facebook messenger* *sips mtn dew twice* *strokes neckbeard* *begins typing* Sorry abt ur mom dying Tis a shame Btw ur attractive

On Facebook: Them: Look! We're at the beach! Me: Look! I'm in your house!

Sometimes I keep Facebook open in two tabs to remind myself I'm worthless.

Getting laughs on Facebook is like going down to the elementary school and dunking on the six foot goals.

Will anyone on Facebook ever have the guts to let everyone else know they married their "best friend"?