Facebook Jokes

Want followers? Tweet something funny. Can't think of anything? Tweet something honest. Can't say anything honest or funny? Try Facebook.

Facebook has really revolutionized how quickly we find out friends from high school gave up on their dreams.

I'm sorry sir, your wife didn't make it. Was it *sniff* the lack of prayers on Facebook? Yes sir, I'm afraid it was.

Yesterday I told my aunt that DTF means "Doing the Facebook". Her daily posts are much more entertaining now.

14-year old Becky writes "Stop wars" as her Facebook status. It gets nine "likes", all from world leaders. Peace reigns forever. She did it.

My mom just sent me a friend request on Facebook. This Is a typical "no right answer" type of situation.

If I knew you in high school and your Facebook profile picture is a baby I'll assume you're Benjamin Button and unfriend you.

"War Horse" and "The Help" are the SAME movie! I watched them on my laptop and they BOTH have a 90 minute scene where I just check Facebook.

Please pray for the people still playing Farmville on Facebook.

So many people on Facebook "Like" everything but grammar.

I didn't post that copyright notice thing on my Facebook and I've already seen SIX of MY photos of me with my casseroles in BMW commercials

If your Facebook picture is a photo of a sunset or something inanimate, I'll assume you have a dissociative identity disorder.

"EVERYONE IS ENGAGED BUT YOU" - facebook

On Facebook, my friend became a fan of Paris Hilton, Heidi Montag and Nickelback. I became a fan of unfriending her.

If you haven't logged onto Facebook for awhile, Judy Ann Ross from 10th grade algebra is enjoying a chicken salad sandwich right now.

I'm just saying, a cartoon character facebook pic isnt going to stop a child abuser! If you see one, call the cops, bam, done.

I'll complain about the government invading my privacy after I tell you where I am on Facebook and posting what I'm eating on Instagram.

If she's naming your wedding album on facebook "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!" she's too young for you bro.

I'm never more ruthless than when deciding who to wish a happy birthday to on Facebook and who to ignore.

Sorry, but breaking up with you on facebook was the best way of letting all your friends know I'm available.

With Facebook, you can stay in touch with people you would otherwise never talk to, but that's only one of the many awful things about it

If your tweet gets stolen and posted on Facebook... It's your own fault for not making it offensive enough!

I saw a church's sign say ""God is my Facebook."" Does that mean two men can poke each other on God?

ok reddit. let's hear your best 9/11 jokes. My plan for tomorrow is to have a near constant stream of jokes on facebook, just to keep spirits up, and of course to offend some people. I would appreciate some help with my jokes!

Facebook is the second most popular word that starts with ""F"" and ends with ""K"" Firetruck is a very popular word!