Starbucks Jokes

I have this thing where I like to take a crap with the door open. Unfortunately, not everyone at Starbucks feels the same way.

Overheard at Starbucks: Man: Would you like to try a pumpkin spice latte? Woman: No. Since Trump came on the scene I am boycotting everything orange.

While walking home from the gym... I saw one of my aerospace engineer buddies at Starbucks. He was buried in his work when I walked next to him and asked, ""bruh, do you even lift?""

Management Training An Indian warrior walks into Starbucks with a shotgun in one hand pulling a male buffalo with the other. He says to the waiter, ""Me want coffee."" The waiter says, ""Sure chief coming right up."" He gets the Indian a tall mug of coffee. The Indian drinks the coffee down in one gulp, turns and blasts the buffalo with the shotgun, causing parts of the animal to splatter everywhere, then just walks out. The next morning the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand pulling…

I like my men like i like my coffee Not from starbucks

What does a martial artist get at starbucks Chai Tea

A man was walking into Starbucks for his daily coffee, except this time there were a ton of birds, numbering in the thousands. He walked in and asked the barista, ""Hey, what's up with all these birds?"" The barista replied, ""I'm not sure, but it's affecting our business. Tell you what, I'll give you a dollar for every bird you can kill. I've got some burnt pastries you can throw at them."" The man walked outside, pastries in hand, and started pelting the birds with them. He quickly ran out of …

What could you create with Starbucks caramel mocha chip frappuccino? The Audi logo and The Olympics logo.

Starbucks order Could I have a no-whip Gagarin au lait? What's that? It's a basically the typical cafe au lait. The only difference its dripped through a micro-filter and must be poured over organic steamed milk. Also, the coffee beans must be roasted by packing them into a copper container which is released into low earth orbit so they roast upon re-entry. Some people get it with whipped cream on top, but I would like mine no whip, but that should make it easy right?

A guy walks into a Starbucks and orders a tall blonde to go... The girl behind him then leaves.

What did the Minotaur order at Starbucks? Half calf

What type of currency do people use in outer space? STARbucks.

You never have to worry about Starbucks running short on coffee. I hear they always have a latte

As soon as I walked in the door the guy behind the bar offered me shots. I said what the hell, ordered three, and quickly drank them down. Next thing I know my pants are off and the cops have showed up. Long story short, they don't let me in that Starbucks anymore.

I need a punchline for this joke I need a punchline for this question: What's the difference between Starbucks and funeral home? I was asked this question this weekend when I told someone to meet me at a Starbucks, and I was waiting at the funeral home down the street, but I feel like there has gotta be a great punchline for it out there. I have an okay punchline, but I figured the Internet could supply me with better.

I like my women like I like my Starbucks Sack off

What does Captain Falcon say when he goes to Starbucks? ""Show me your brews!""

You know what's odd about those girls at Starbucks? They, like, literally can't, even.

Labels In Society I really hate labels in society. Every action you do and every interest you have has a ""category"" and you get lumped together with a group, and it's stupid. If I like video games, I'm a ""nerd"". If I like Starbucks, I'm ""basic"". If I sneak into your house at 3 am and watch you sleep even though I'm pretty sure you dropped multiple hints, I'm labeled a ""creep"". It's ridiculous!

An MIT grad, a Harvard alum and a teenager that just got released from juvenile hall are all working at a Starbucks. ...

A guy walks up to a girl in Starbucks Hey girl, how would you like to be my skinny vanilla latte? go light on the cream though, that's for later.

A yoga pants owner, an uggs owner, and an iphone owner walks into a starbucks She orders a drink - Pumpkin Spice Latte

A guy walks up to a white girl at Starbucks ""Hey girl, Are you Sodium Oxide? Because you're so basic.""

I told the Starbucks batista my name was Mary Krismas... They still can't get the spelling right.

I've been working out at Starbucks lately. Hitting the french press.