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Turkey Jokes

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A turkey was chatting with a bull. ""I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,"" sighed the turkey, ""but I haven't got the energy"". ""Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?"" replied the bull ""They're packed with nutrients."" The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fortnight, there he was prou

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One day a farmer decides to go hunt up a turkey dinner for his family... After a long day of hunting the farmer shots himself a turkey and brings it home to start cleaning and cooking it up for dinner. The turkey made a great dinner and the farmers family quickly finished it and then went about their usual night time routine. About a hour after dinner the farmers daughter comes up to the farmer and says ""Daddy daddy, I just went to the bathroom and peed shotgun pellets."" The farmer replies ""W

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Two old ladies are walking down the street. It's hot, they're sweaty. The first old lady says, ""If you take your panties off, you'll cool down faster."" The second old lady says, ""Bullshit."" They keep walking down the road. It's still hot, they're sweaty. They see a third old lady sitting on her front porch. She's got a dress on, legs spread open, and she's got a turkey leg in her hand. The first old lady says, ""Ya see, she's got no panties on, I bet she's cooler than you."" The second old l

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True Story of Joke Told at Ft Benning, GA In class 92-1 of Infantry Officer Basic course we were in a large lecture hall in building 4 at Ft. Benning, GA. Desert Storm had just finished less than a year previously and we were one of the first classes of new infantry officers to get a look at all the cool intelligence from Iraq. We were there for an ultra-serious national security lecture. There were at least 200 young officers listening to Colonels and Generals discuss various Geo-Political issu

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The swearing parrot. Did you hear about guy who had a parrot who swore continually. Finally, the guy told the parrot if he didn't clean up his language, he was going to throw him in the freezer. The parrot continued to swear, so the guy did as he had threatened. After a couple of hours the guy let the parrot out of the freezer, asking him if he had learned his lesson. Shivering, the parrot said that he had and wouldn't swear any more. After a few minutes, the parrot told the guy he had one quest

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Jokes of the day!! 1. A man goes to a pet shop and buys a talking parrot. He takes the parrot home and tries to teach the parrot how to say a few things, but instead, the parrot just swears at him. After a few hours of trying to teach the bird, the man finally says, ""If you don't stop swearing, I'm going to put you in the freezer as punishment."" The parrot continues, so finally the man puts the bird in the freezer. About an hour later, the parrot asks the man to please open the door. As the ma

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The Parrot A man goes to a pet shop and buys a talking parrot. He takes the parrot home and tries to teach the parrot how to say a few things, but instead, the parrot just swears at him. After a few hours of trying to teach the bird, the man finally says, ""If you don't stop swearing, I'm going to put you in the freezer as punishment."" The parrot continues, so finally the man puts the bird in the freezer. About an hour later, the parrot asks the man to please open the door. As the man takes the

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A blond, a redhead, and a brunette are at school one day eating lunch The blond says to her friends, ""If I have another turkey sandwich for lunch, I'm going to kill myself!"" The redhead, knowing how she feels says, ""if I get a ham sandwich for lunch one more time, then I'm going to kill myself!"" The brunette chimes in and says, ""you know, if I get another stupid tuna sandwich for lunch one more time, I'm definitely going to kill myself!"" And with that they ate their lunch and continued the

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Tearful Bride A new young blonde bride calls her mother in tears. She sobs, ""Robert doesn't appreciate what I do for him."" ""Now, now,"" her mother comforted, ""I am sure it was all just a misunderstanding."" ""No, mother, you don't understand. I bought a frozen turkey roll and he yelled and screamed at me about the price!"" ""Well, the nerve of that lousy cheapskate!"" says her mom. ""Those turkey rolls are only a few dollars."" ""No, mother it wasn't the price of the turkey, it was the airpl

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423 lunatic escapes Around 1960, Elazg, Turkey. 423 lunatic escapes from Elazg Asylum and spreads out in the city. Famous doctor Mutemet Yazc is the head of hospital. Security officers concerned and seeks advice from him. Mr. Mutemet asks for a whistle and tells his staff to stick on his back and follow. Doc at the front, couple of staff behind starts roaming city as a train. All the lunatics around sticks and follows them. They are 612 when return to hospital.

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Food and Country Yesterday I was so Hungary, I decided to Czech if there was any food. I was Russian to the fridge, but found only a Turkey full of Greece. Iran to the store to get some salt, pepper, Chile and Korea-nder, because I was in the mood for some Sweden sour. I found Iraq of pork chops but there was Norway I could eat them all. The Romanian ingredients where some Belize pepper and a Canada best soup I could ever find. Can you Bolivia it? I Cyprus the urge of buying some Fiji Water. I H

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