Texas Jokes

3 surgeons walk into a pub... ...The first claims to be the best surgeon of Texas: ""the world's best piano player lost 7 fingers in an accident. I sewed them back on and yesterday

A cowboy from Texas A cowboy

They really grow them big in Texas A Texan went to Chicago and thought he would buy a new ""city"" outfit.

At some point I really want to manage a Wal-mart in Texas. I want to be a Texas Chain Store Manager.

The Pope visits Texas The Pope was state bound scheduled to give a speech in Dallas

Fishing and tampons... A young guy from Texas moves to California and goes to a big department store looking for a job. The manager says

The Best Actually Racist Joke I know *I hate myself for repeating this. But I heard this when I was living in Texas.*

An elderly but hardy cattleman from Texas once told a young female neighbor...

What did the Texas sheriff say about the black guy who was shot 15 times? ""Worse case of suicide I ever saw.""

BREAKING NEWS: Texas A&M Library burns to ground... Both books were completely destroyed.

Two drunks Two drunks were drinking on the roof of their trailer late one night in Texas. The first drunk looks up at the night sky and says to the other ""The moon is so big

A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas

Texas Sheriffs Deputy Exam A man in Texas looking to join the Frio County Sheriffs Dept. was being interviewed. The Sergeant doing the interview says

How to Sell a Dead Donkey Young Chuck moved to Texas and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100.

A Blind Man visits the State of Texas... There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane

A black man walks into a gun store in Texas. ""I would like to see that glock on the display wall"

Big John A man moves from New York City to the heart of Texas and applies for a job as a bartender.

I won't believe corporations are people Until Texas executes one.

A cowboy... ... walks into a bar in Texas and orders three beers. He sits at the bar

A DEA officer walks on to ranch in Texas... A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Bandera Texas

Everything is bigger in Texas A Texan man was driving thru rural NSW with his Aussie chaperone when they passed a cornfield.

A Blind Man Travels to Texas....... A blind man headed to Texas for his vacation. Upon arriving at the hotel

Choice A pompous minister was seated next to a cowboy on a flight to Texas. After the plane was airborne

Why California is broke and Texas is not. The governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the governor's dog