Q&A Jokes

What do you call a row of boxers-in-training? A shitty punch line.

What's the best thing about fingering a gypsy on her period? You get your palm read for free

What do you call a pile of cats? A MEOWTAIN. Told this one at work after two weeks straight of 12+ hours days and laughed so hard I got sent home for the rest of the day to get sleep. To this day, every time I tell it I start giggling uncontrollably... Yep.

Did you hear about the iguana that couldn't mate in captivity? He had a reptile disfunction.

Why couldn't Bing start a fire? No matches founds

What have the films 'Titanic' and 'The Sixth Sense' got in common? Icy dead people.

What does a taxidermist do for a living? Oh you know... stuff...

Dad just dropped this at my cousin's 8th birthday party...I was the only one to burst out laughing.. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.

Knock Knock Knock Knock who's there? to to who? to whom.

Why are organ donations low ? Because most people have pianos

How old do you think I am? A woman decided to have a face lift for her birthday. She spent $5000 and felt really good about the results. On her way home she stopped at a dress shop to look around. As she was leaving, she said to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?" "About 35," was the reply. "I'm actually 47," the woman said, feeling really happy. After that she went into McDonalds for lunch and asked the order taker the same question. H…

Why does Peter Pan always fly? Because he Neverlands! You're welcome.

Did you hear about the Mexican train killer? He had loco motives.

A Black Widow joke Q: How do you kill a Black Widow? A: You take away her food stamps Was told his one at a family reunion, don't know how old but thought it was funny as hell!

Did you hear about the mechanic who was addicted to brake fluid? He said he could stop at anytime.

What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran wrap? Well, I can clearly see your nuts.

What do lesbian vegetarians eat? Vaggie burgers

What do men and tile floors have in common? ...if you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them for years.

Prognosis? Doctors are reporting that a man was admitted to the hospital last week and found to have at least a dozen plastic horses inserted in his rectum. His condition is "stable".

What do blondes and computer have in common? You never appreciate them until they go down on you. [Source](http://www.vice.com/kids-telling-dirty-jokes/david-741) edit: computers

What's Robin Hood's favourite font? Sans Sheriff!

An American investment banker was taking a much-needed vacation An American investment banker was taking a much-needed vacation in a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. The boat had several large, fresh fish in it. The investment banker was impressed by the quality of the fish and asked the Mexican how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied, “Only a little while.” The banker then asked why he didn’t stay out longer and catch more fish? The …

Does anyone else love thick sandwiches with three slices of bread and two layers of filling? We should make a club.

Translated Indian Joke A man is leaving his village for the first time to visit the big city. His fellow villagers don't want him to get ripped off, so they give him some advice - never agree to the seller's price... always ask for half the price. So the man arrives at the city, and sees an umbrella store. He heads in to buy an umbrella. He asks the clerk how much for an umbrella. The clerk replies: $10. Sticking to his strategy, the man says: How about $5? The clerk tries to negotiate, but …

What is the difference between a girl from London and a Kitkat? You only get 4 fingers in a Kitkat.