Google Jokes

Soon as I finish untangling these earphones I'm goin to google who made them & I'm going to ask them to invent shoelaces that tie themselves

shout out to old people for graduating high school without google

Kids these days can't do shit without #Google. When I was a kid I didn't have Google. So, I pretty much couldn't do shit.

Was driving with my dad the other day and he told me to get the map out of the glove box. Easy there Indiana Jones, I will just google it.

My kid asked for help with her report but if I did it for her she won't learn! So I showed how to google, change name, & print on her own.

I ask Google the questions I'm too scared to ask other people.

My Google searches read like an alien trying learn how to be a person.

ME: we can do this GOOGLE SMART CAR: we can't clear the bridge ME: *mashes 'im feeling lucky' button*

Before the internet, it was way harder to google stuff

Never sky dived before, but I just zoomed google maps way too fast. Pure adrenaline.

That show "Catfish" should just be called "People Who Have Never Heard of Google."

Google glasses? No thanks, too much tech. It's weird "You can secretly watch Netflix at work" Oh, please take literally all of my money.

Cyclists who don't obey the rules of the road should have to wear their google search history on a t-shirt.

True intimacy is chatting within a shared Google Doc

Pretty sure Google has this master plan of taking over the world by blackmailing everyone with their search history.

In Hell, all of your Google searches post directly to your social media accounts.

noah's google search history: "wat is arc" "why would god want circle segment" "arc or ark" "how many animals" "5,000,000 x 2" "is god real"

My ex wife asked me to check on her house while she was on vacation.... Google Earth says everything is just fine.

Daughter steals my iPad so I left Google open on "too many kids" & "making it look accidental." Found my iPad but haven't seen her all day.

INCREASINGLY DESPERATE GOOGLE SEARCH FOR "HOW MANY SHADOWS SHOULD I HAVE?"

Why would anybody ask me anything when google exists?

"If you like Google Glass, also try Bing Chewables."

Before Google, there was memory.

i hate when you google stuff like 'insidious' it gives you the definition but when you google 'butt' it doesn't. define butt for me damn it

Google would like to use your current location. Allow/Deny? Allow *100 Google employees throw a party at my house*