"Pika pika pika!" [translated] "I'm sorry, children. Your father was stolen by a Pokemon trainer who has to beat a child named Gary."#Gary#Kids#Parents0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Whenever someone says they don't like the Beatles, I'm like "Whatever, Gary." (their name isn't necessarily Gary; that's just an example)#Gary#The Beatles0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
9 out of 10 dentists agree that Gary is the most handsome dentist. Gary voted for Brett because he couldn't vote for himself#Gary#Brett#Doctor0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
[bank robbery] "Todd, where the hell is the getaway car?" TODD: *zooming up on a Segway* FOSSIL FUELS ARE RUINING THIS PLANET, GARY#Todd#Gary#Money#Religion+1 more0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Guy: Why does everyone call you "Gross Gary"? Gary: [filling a canteen with hotdog water] Nobody calls me that.#Gary#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
"Gary give me the gun" "I thought you had it" "I TOLD you to bring it" "I didn't" "who brought the getaway car?" -Disorganized crime#Gary#Driving0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
GARY BUSEY: I WANNA WRITE A BOOK HIS AGENT: gary that's a bad ideahow'd you feel about a ghost writer? GARY: SCARED AS HELL BUT I LIKE IT#Gary Busey#Gary#Religion0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. Who threw that? Gary, was that you? Don't act innocent, I know you download music illegally.#Gary0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
ur honor, i call GOD as my witness *jury gasps* *nothimg happens* *slowley, a man w/ beard rises from the stands* damit no Gary sit down#Gary#Lawyer0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
MAYOR'S TIP: before you spend 20 minutes blowing an air mattress, make sure it's really an air mattress, and not Gary hiding under a blanket#Gary0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Imagine you know a guy named Gary, & Gary calls his car the Garymobile & insists that you do, too. What I'm saying is Batman is a douche#Gary#Driving0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
where do y'all wanna go tonight? Bars? The club? "THE BOG OF DESPAIR" Gary, after the forest of skulls debacle you don't get to pick anymore#Gary0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
The inventor of the toilet must've had a rough time at his presentation. "Oh here comes Gary with his poop throne idea"#Gary#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Everybody was Kung Fu fighting. Except Gary. Gary was in your house going through your underwear drawer. He also kissed your cat.#Gary#Animals0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
YOGA CLASS INSTRUCTOR: And now we go into downward dog *loud thud GARY WHO IS A T-REX: I'm ok. I'm ok. It's just a bloody nose.#Gary#Animals0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
[wedding] Priest: repeat after me Groom: after me P: ... [to bride] is he serious Bride: no his name is gary#Gary#Marriage#Religion#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
HEAD OF THE NATIONAL WEATHER SEVICE: so how will we name all these hurricanes? GARY, WHOS BEEN DIVORCED 31 TIMES: i have an idea#Gary0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
FOR CHRISSAKES, GARY - WE JUST ROBBED A DAMN BANK! THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO TEACH YOUR NIECE HOW TO DRIVE!#Gary#Money#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
MOM: Any plans tonight? ME: Me and the guys heading out to find us some ladees *shoots finger guns HER: So Pokemon Go with Gary? M: Yessss#Gary#Parents0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
"Hi, my name is Gary and I'm a shopaholic, my favorite place to shop is the alcohol store."#Gary#Bar#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
[meeting] BOSS: We need a name that gives us a good ad slogan ME: Perhapselline? MY NEMESIS GARY: Maybelline? B: You're incredible, Gary#Gary#Work0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
[at the zoo] Llama spits in my face I spit in llamas face Llama slaps me I grab llamas hair Scuffle ensues Llamas gf shouts "leave it Gary!"#Gary0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
"U can legally stab someone if u suspect they're a Gary." -no you can't *pulling knife from sheath* "Sounds like somthin a Gary would say"#Gary0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
me: damnit, i forgot to get my bus fare reimbursed this month sally: go see gary in HR, he's pretty flexible [walks in on gary doing yoga]#Gary0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
My inner man is a fabulous gay dude named Gary who loves pedicures and bon-bons.#Gary#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp