Savannah Jokes

The time my grandpa went to Africa One day I was sitting with my grandpa watching TV. As it happened we were watching the Discovery channel when a show about Africa came on. ""Hmph, Africa... I've been there."" My grandpa said. ""Really?"" I asked, ""I never knew you went to Africa grandpa, when was this?"" ""Well,"" he said, ""when I went to Africa I was about your age. Eighteen. And back then they didn't have no jet airplanes that could get you there in ten hours. No siree!"" ""First, we got o…

50 of the least offensive jokes I know. 1. When does a car stop being a car? When it's driving down the road and turns into a driveway. 2. What do you get when you cross a brown chicken and a brown cow? Brownchickenbrowncow. *Edited to lower offense levels* 3. Why do Programmers wear costumes on Christmas? Because DEC 25 is OCT 31. *Edited to lower offense levels* 4. How do you throw a party in space? You planet. 5. Where does the king keep his armies? In his sleevies. 6. How many mosquitoes doe…

The Lion with Christian feelings Once upon a time... there was a missionary walking along the savannah when he suddenly encountered himself with a very hungry lion. Scared to death, the missionary went down on knees and prayed ""Oh dear Lord, please come down and give christian feelings to this poor criature"". After one second, the miracle occurred: the lion knelt down and prayed ""Oh dear lord, bless this food you have provided me"".

How to catch an Elephant. You go out to the African Savannah, looking to catch an elephant. How do you do it? Well, it's very simple. You go out to the middle of the plains, and take a shovel, and as much paper and paper products as you can bring out there. Now, it might take a while to dig a hole big enough, but it's worth it to catch that elephant. Now, after you've dug the hole, you dump all the paper into it. Remember, this has to be a hole big enough for an elephant, so it needs to be a lot…

The Hellarwe tribe. There's a tribe of pygmies in Africa called the Hellarwe. They're an ancient tribe that settled the tall, savannah grasslands a long time ago and I had the fortune of going to visit them. I actually thought we were lost until I saw a pygmy jump up ahead of us accompanied by his fearsome warcry: ""Wherethehellarewe""

A lion walks into a savannah restaurant (made this one up while brushing my teeth this morning!) A lion walks into a restaurant on the savannah and asks what's on the menu. ""We can cook anything you want,"" replies the host, ""elephant, wildebeest, hippo -- if it lives here, we can grill it up for you."" The lion thinks for minute, then asks, ""Do you have giraffe? I've really been hankering for some giraffe."" ""Sorry man,"" replies the host, ""that's a tall order."" any suggestions / help wit…

what keeps the lions from leaving the savannah the ele-fence

Tarzan's unfortunate accident Tarzan was doing his thing in the jungle, swinging from tree to tree, when all of the sudden this huge truck runs him over and leaves him in a terrible condition. So the jungle animals had a gathering to decide how to help their leader, cause they couldn't just leave him all crippled. After much discussing, the lion says: "I can spare one of my mighty legs, I'll donate it to our king". The gorilla comes forward and says, "I can spare an arm, I'll give it to our…

The Lion with Christian feelings Once upon a time... there was a missionary walking along the savannah when he suddenly encountered himself with a very hungry lion.

Do you know the story of Flap Flap The Giraffe?,"Flap Flap The Giraffe was walking around the savannah, when a helicopter came in to land. The giraffe looked up and then :::flap flap::: the giraffe!

Do you guys know the story of Flip Flap the Giraffe?,"It's a giraffe, walking in the savannah. All of a sudden an helicopter comes by and..... flip flap the giraffe!

Do you know the story of Flap Flap The Giraffe? Flap Flap The Giraffe was walking around the savannah, when a helicopter came in to land. The giraffe looked up, and then :::flap flap::: the giraffe!

Why can you trust noone in the savannah? Cause they be lion.

Do you guys know the story of Flip Flap the Giraffe? It's a giraffe, walking in the savannah. All of a sudden, an helicopter comes by and..... flip flap the giraffe!