The time my grandpa went to Africa One day I was sitting with my grandpa watching TV. As it happened we were watching the Discovery channel when a show about Africa came on. ""Hmph, Africa... I've been there."" My grandpa said. ""Really?"" I asked, ""I never knew you went to Africa grandpa, when was this?"" ""Well,"" he said, ""when I went to Africa I was about your age. Eighteen. And back then they didn't have no jet airplanes that could get you there in ten hours. No siree!"" ""First, we got o…

The Lion with Christian feelings Once upon a time... there was a missionary walking along the savannah when he suddenly encountered himself with a very hungry lion. Scared to death, the missionary went down on knees and prayed ""Oh dear Lord, please come down and give christian feelings to this poor criature"". After one second, the miracle occurred: the lion knelt down and prayed ""Oh dear lord, bless this food you have provided me"".

How to catch an Elephant. You go out to the African Savannah, looking to catch an elephant. How do you do it? Well, it's very simple. You go out to the middle of the plains, and take a shovel, and as much paper and paper products as you can bring out there. Now, it might take a while to dig a hole big enough, but it's worth it to catch that elephant. Now, after you've dug the hole, you dump all the paper into it. Remember, this has to be a hole big enough for an elephant, so it needs to be a lot…

A lion walks into a savannah restaurant (made this one up while brushing my teeth this morning!) A lion walks into a restaurant on the savannah and asks what's on the menu. ""We can cook anything you want,"" replies the host, ""elephant, wildebeest, hippo -- if it lives here, we can grill it up for you."" The lion thinks for minute, then asks, ""Do you have giraffe? I've really been hankering for some giraffe."" ""Sorry man,"" replies the host, ""that's a tall order."" any suggestions / help wit…