Eu Jokes

Earthquake Nigeria suffered from a severe earthquake last week, resulting in the dead of 12000 inhabitants. The EU is sending first aid and some countries add their own contributions. France is sending military troops to rebuild the country, Germany is sending food packets and Holland is sending 12000 niggers.

The EU has finally decided to adopt English as its primary language, over German. The European Union has just announced an agreement whereby English will be its official language rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this …

Explanation of the crisis in Italy & Greece. A small town in Italy twinned with a similar town in Greece. The Mayor of the Greek town visited the Italian town. When he saw the palatial mansion belonging to the Italian mayor he wondered how he could afford such a house. The Italian said; "You see that bridge over there? The EU gave us a grant to build a two-lane bridge, but by building a single lane bridge with traffic lights at either end this house could be built". Soon after, the Italian vis…

The European Commission The European Commission has announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU, rather than German, which was the other contender. Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had room for improvement and has therefore accepted a five-year phasing in of "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make sivil servants jump for joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k", Which sho…

The European Commission has announced that English is the official Language of the EU The European Commission has announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU, rather than German, which was the other contender. Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had room for improvement and has therefore accepted a five-year phasing in of "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make sivil servants jump for joy…

Should English be the only official language of the EU? The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this…

Europe be like... eu: uk bro? uk: it's not eu, it's me.

Rick Astley's releasing a new song lamenting the 'Brexit' result... It's titled: Never Gonna Give EU Up

Hey EU, heard you lost a country... ..., UK bro?

They said Brexit would let us get closer to non-EU countries. They were right, we now have more in common with Zimbabwe than ever before.

The European Commission has announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU The European Commission has announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU, rather than German, which was the other contender. Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had room for improvement and has therefore accepted a five-year phasing in of "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make sivil …

English to become official language of the EU The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make t…

There was an interesting legal dispute between Portugal and Denmark Portugal had sold off some of their fishing rights to the Danish government. There were many details and stipulations, things about the size of the nets, number of boats, locations, environmental protections, types of fish to be caught, etc etc. But the one that became relevant was about the usage of the fish. See, Portugal wasn't making that much money off of selling certain fish as food anyway, but they did want to retain c…

English to become the official EU language The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.  As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".  In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make th…

How much space will be freed in the EU after Brexit? Approximately 1 GB.

English to become the official European language. The European Commission has announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU, rather than German, which was the other contender. Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had room for improvement and has therefore accepted a five-year phasing in of "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make sivil servants jump for joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in f…

A German in a Bar A German walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender tells him : "20 euros!" The German is shocked - "20 euros? yesterday it was only 3 euros !" "Well, today it is 20 euros." \- "But why 20, damn it?" Bar tender : "I'll explain it, \-3 euros is beer, \-3 to help Ukraine, \-4 assistance to European countries who have imposed sanctions and are not members of the EU. \-4 euros in aid to the UK, for successful implementation of sanctions against Russia. \-Then 3 eu…

The EU was invited to a thanksgiving dinner but they refused to have turkey

How much free space does the EU have since Great Britain left? 1 GB

The EU is like a box of chocolates; Nobody likes the Turkish.

Britain should have written a break up note ""It's not EU

They said Brexit would let us get closer to non-EU countries. They were right

Hey EU heard you lost a country...

Should English be the only official language of the EU? The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German

The EU has finally decided to adopt English as its primary language over German.