Portugal Jokes

Translated Brazilian Joke - A broken car in the desert ** In Brazil it is common making jokes about our colonizers, the Portuguese. I hope they do the same about us in Portugal, so... ** A Portuguese, a Brazilian and an Argentinian are driving through the desert when their car suddenly breaks. Joao, the Brazilian suggests each one takes a piece of the car to help their journey walking back to the town. Santiago, the Argentinian says: - I'll take the seat, so if I'm tired I can sit on it and rest…

TIL Nickleback, tired and at their last show across Europe (in Portugal), had roadies throw things at them from within the audience during the show. The lead singer used it as an excuse to walk off stage, thus getting them out of having to perform. Just kidding. It was their fans throwing shit at them because everyone hates Nickleback even their fans.

What's the best thing about portugal? You never have to carry your bags because of all the porter-geese. Thankyou, im here till monday!

After a tie with Portugal in the World Cup, the U.S. soccer team now faces Germany on Thursday. And if the U.S. team beats Germany, they advance. If they lose, Americans go back to hating soccer again.

What birds are found in Portugal ? Portu-geese !

Translated Brazilian Joke - A broken car in the desert ** In Brazil it is common making jokes about our colonizers, the Portuguese. I hope they do the same about us in Portugal, so... ** A Portuguese, a Brazilian and an Argentinian are driving through the desert when their car suddenly breaks. João, the Brazilian suggests each one takes a piece of the car to help their journey walking back to the town. Santiago, the Argentinian says: - I'll take the seat, so if I'm tired I can sit on it and …

A man walks into a bar and orders three drinks. The barman serves him and then watches as the man alternates between each drink until all three are empty. "Why do you drink them in that fashion?" asks the barman. The man replies "I have two brothers, and they've both recently moved away. One is in Portugal, and the other is in Peru. But we've decided that we should still all drink together once a week, so right now my brothers are doing the exact same thing." The barman, thinking it a wonder…

There was an interesting legal dispute between Portugal and Denmark Portugal had sold off some of their fishing rights to the Danish government. There were many details and stipulations, things about the size of the nets, number of boats, locations, environmental protections, types of fish to be caught, etc etc. But the one that became relevant was about the usage of the fish. See, Portugal wasn't making that much money off of selling certain fish as food anyway, but they did want to retain c…

The Invasion of Normandy It was a tough morning on the Omaha beach, and the landing of the Allied troops was not going well. The beach was riddled with obstacles and mines, and the German gunfire was relentless. Suddenly, the Allied men notice a man emerging from the waters. “I can help you”, he declares in deep voice. “Who are you?”, a soldier asks. ”Doesn’t matter” ”Where are you from?” ”Well, I am a soldier from Portugal. But I have decided to not be neutral today. Let me handle this…

Why was Portugal the best colonial power? Spain had thousands of colonists

What kind of birds can you find in Portugal? Portugeese

You know the times have changed... When Portugal leaves Brazil without taking any Gold.

What do you call an old person from Portugal? A portugeeser

What do you call a man from Portugal? A Portugoose. Because you cant have one gees.