Darth Vader Jokes

Darth Vader once baked some cookies... But it was a little on the dark side.

Who was the first black guy to admit he was the father? Darth Vader.

Darth Vader should've married... A woman named Ella

Luke got Darth Vader a Christmas Present. Darth Vader: Luke... I know what you got me for Christmas... Luke: Nooo! No! No!! How could you possibly know?!?! Darth Vader: I felt your presents.

Seasonal Star Wars joke > **Darth Vader**: Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas. > **Luke**: How? > **Darth Vader**: I felt your presents. EDIT: Formatting

Which dessert did Darth Vader order in the Mexican restaurant? Helado oscuro!

Ellie Goulding could really take her relationship to the next level... ... if she married Darth Vader (Don't know if I should be proud, but yes this is OC)

How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side.

How did Darth Vader know what Luke would get for Christmas? He felt his presents.

In the vein of today's Star Wars announcement, a topical joke In a deleted scene from Return of the Jedi, Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are fighting a duel to the death when suddenly Darth says to Luke: ""Not only am I your Father, but I also know what you're getting for Christmas!"" Taken aback by the change of subject and suspecting a trap, Luke replies cautiously: ""How could you possibly know what I'm getting for Christmas?"" Darth Vader: ""Because I've felt your presents...""

Help me figure out a knock knock joke that's had me stumped for 20 years When I was a kid my sisters and I ordered a book of knock knock jokes from the book club at school. I remember reading them to everyone who came by the house but there was one that I never understood. No one in my life has ever had a logical explanation for it and I have never forgotten it: Knock Knock. Who's there? Darth Vader. Darth Vader who? Darth Vader Cookie Crumble. __ WTF?

Darth Vader told me he knows what i'm getting for Christmas He said he felt my presents...

In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.

What did Darth Vader say to the Internet? May the force e-with you.

Seasonal Star Wars joke > **Darth Vader**: Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas. > **Luke**: How? > **Darth Vader**: I felt your presents. EDIT: Formatting

Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are on an epic fight... Suddenly, Vader stops swinging. He pulls Luke close to him, and says: *breathing sounds* "I know what you are getting for Christmas" "WHAT?? IT CAN'T BE! HOW?" *breathing sounds* "Because I have felt your presents"

So Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are locked in their final showdown... ...light sabers are flashing, the balance is delicate, but suddenly Luke knocks Darth's weapon away. As it's skidding out of reach, Luke moves in for the final blow. Quickly, Darth holds up a hand and says "Luke, wait! I need to tell you something". Luke, sensing a trap, asks why he should do such a thing. Darth replies, "Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas." Slightly taken aback, Luke asks "How do you know that?…

My friends 10 yo daughter made this up while in the elevator today: "Did you know Darth Vader has another daughter?" Mom: "No, who?" Daughter: "Ella, Ella Vader."

What do you call a man whose wife was the Queen, his daughter a Princess and his boss an Emperor, but he himself is no royal? Darth Vader.

You are Darth Vader. How can you tell if your stormtroopers just played paintball in their freetime again? You can't.

Do you know why Darth Vader was referred to as Lord Vader ? Because all the storm troopers giggled when they heard master Vader. My wife just told me this.

In tribute to James Earl Jones, a Darth Vader joke. Darth Vader walks into a record store and asks if they have a copy of George Michael's first studio album. The clerk says they are sold out, to which Vader responds, "I find your lack of Faith disturbing"

What did Darth Vader tell Luke Skywalker at the dinner table? Use the fork, Luke.

How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker was getting for Christmas? He felt his presents.

(from my 11 yo) What does Darth Vader say after cutting someone's head off with a lightsaber? "I find your lack of face disturbing."