Christmas is becoming more and more commercialised every year. Pushing up prices in every sector This tweet is brought to you by Tesco#Tesco#Holiday0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Britain's got pretty racist since the referendum; I was behind a Latvian couple in Tesco yesterday and the lady behind the checkout asked if they wanted any help packing...#Tesco0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Just been to Tesco and swapped 50 raisins for 100 sultanas Can't believe the currant exchange rate!#Tesco#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Lazy Dad I was shopping in Tesco with my Daughter earlier & she turned around and said ""Your such a lazy bastard dad"" I was so shocked I nearly fell out the trolley!#Tesco#Parents0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Well, that's definitely the last time I ever go shopping with my wife... We were on our way home from Tesco this morning and she dropped down dead.#Tesco#Marriage#Dark Humor0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Quite a few years back Steve jobs visited our town He was on some trip to promote the iPad, one day he went into our local tesco and bought tonnes of shoe polish, pretty much sold the store out, damn Jobs, coming over here and taking our polish#Town He#Tesco0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Tesco reported a 6.4bn loss.. I guess that's what you get for betting on horses!#Tesco#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
The two minutes silence in Tesco was so well-observed you could hear a pin drop. Then my poppy fell off too.#Tesco#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
My favourite joke at the moment... How do you get an elephant in to a plastic bag? First you take the 'T' out of 'Tesco', what do you get? Esco. Then you take the 'F' out of 'Weigh', what do you get?#Tesco#Animals0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
A boy bought some Tesco burgers from the canteen, The dinnerlady asked what he wanted on them. The boy replied: ""I'll have 5 each way!""#Tesco0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
I think someone may be sending me death threats. Woke up this morning with a [Tesco burger](http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-21038521) on my pillow!#Tesco#Dark Humor0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
I ate some Tesco burgers last night. I think it's given me the trots.#Tesco#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
A Tesco Burger, produced in Ireland walks into a bar.. He says to the barman 'Can I have a pint please?' Barman says 'Sorry pal, didn't quite catch that, speak up a bit' Burger says 'Sorry there, I'm a little bit horse'#Ireland#Tesco#Animals#Bar0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Checking the meats at my local Tesco... I looked for the burgers but it looks like they are *NEIGGHHH*-ver selling them again.#Tesco0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
I popped into Tesco last night to get some oxo cubes but couldn't see any on the shelf, they must be out of stock!#Tesco#One-Liner0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Lazy Dad I was shopping in Tesco with my Daughter earlier & she turned around and said "Your such a lazy bastard dad" I was so shocked I nearly fell out the trolley!#Tesco#Parents0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
My good deed for the day. This morning at the Tesco check out I was behind an old lady in the queue. Her bill came to £56.83 but when she counted out all her change she only had just under £50. I thought she was probably someone’s Nan and I’d like to think someone would have helped my Nan out in that situation. She didn’t want me to help her but I insisted and in no time at all#Tesco0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Bilbo was surprised to wake one morning and find that a Tesco had been built right next to his house#Tesco0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
I was checking out at Tesco... I was checking out at Tesco today when I noticed the man in front of me put one item on the conveyor belt... a box of condoms. Not only did he notice me staring#Tesco0🔗 ShareWhatsApp
Lazy Dad I was shopping in Tesco with my Daughter earlier & she turned around and said ""Your such a lazy bastard dad"#Tesco#Parents0🔗 ShareWhatsApp