Saudi Arabia Jokes

Some joke my dad told me a long time ago What's one profession that doctors, lawyers, even the king of Saudi Arabia and the presidents of the USSR and US bow their heads to? Barbers.

So Saudi Arabia Was Elected Head Of The Human Rights Panel...

Saudi Arabia 'chosen to head key UN human rights panel' Joke is UN.

Saudi Arabia hates Scooby Doo... But Abu Dhabi Doo!

True Story of Joke Told at Ft Benning, GA In class 92-1 of Infantry Officer Basic course we were in a large lecture hall in building 4 at Ft. Benning, GA. Desert Storm had just finished less than a year previously and we were one of the first classes of new infantry officers to get a look at all the cool intelligence from Iraq. We were there for an ultra-serious national security lecture. There were at least 200 young officers listening to Colonels and Generals discuss various Geo-Political issu…

Vacancy announcements these days Required qualifications: - Work experience of 50 years or more; - Incumbent must defeat a dragon; - Willingness to work on weekends and holidays; - Helicopter piloting licence; - Ability to programme in any language imaginable; - Knowledge of Swahili at least at uppr intrmdit level; - Daily acquisition of 100,500 new clients; - Understanding of thermonuclear fusion; - Experience organising concerts of Cannibal Corpse in Saudi Arabia; - Confidence in using telekin…

TIL: The Flintstones is actually quite controversial in Saudi Arabia, because Dubai really doesn't like it... But Abu Dhabi do!

What's the difference between America and Saudi Arabia? You don't need a computer to play minesweeper in Saudi Arabia. (I'm not sorry)

Prince Charles faces strong criticism while visiting Saudi Arabia... One onlooker was heard bellowing, ""Look at the ears on that!""

The Job Promotion Saudi Arabia just announced that someone was promoted be the new Oil Minister. That would make it a sheikh-up in the government.

So there's a janitor in New York.... So there's a janitor in New York, let's call him Joe. Joe's not all that particular about his work as long as he's working and getting paid. One day, Joe saw an job posting for a mosque looking for someone to clean the place up at night after the worshipers had gone home. So, he contacts the mosque and takes the job. It turns out that the worshipers generally keep the mosque pretty clean and it ends up being easy money for a guy like Joe. He's left with enoug…

Did you hear Saudi Arabia's new slogan? Saudi Arabia the trade center of the world since our guys destroyed the last one.

How do you call the guy who immigrates to Saudi Arabia? Wannabee Wahhabi.

MERS is infecting people in Saudi Arabia... And Haj is just around the corner!

An Englishman, a Scotsman, and a Paddy go to Saudi Arabia. They decide to start drinking and somehow get caught. the go to see the Sultan for their punishment. The Sultan says ""You're lucky today. I'm feeling nice today and I will only give you 50 lashes and you can choose to put anything on your back."" The Englishman chooses a pillow and the pillow takes 6 lashes and he gets the rest on the back. The Scotsman goes next. he chooses a barrel top. The barrel top takes 25 and he takes the rest to…

Why does Saudi Arabia import so many camels from Australia? They've got to get their 72 virgins *somewhere*

Mitt Romney and the King of Saudi-Arabia are having a dinner party... ...the mood of the night is very good and after they spent a while talking about what new amazing things they have bought for themselves and the amount of money they managed to acquire in the past year, as well as all sorts of political matters they come to some lighter topics. So the King says to Mitt: ""I really like parts of American culture, especially American television. My favourite show in the world is 'Star Trek'. But…

A big earthquake hits the Middle East... A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hit the Middle East. Two million Muslims died and over a million were injured. Iraq and Iran are totally ruined and the governments don’t know where to start with providing help to rebuild. The rest of the world is in shock. The USA is sending troops to help. Saudi Arabia is sending oil. Latin American countries are sending Supplies. New Zealand is sending sheep, cattle and food crops. The A…

An Englishman, a German, and a Frenchman... An Englishman, a German and a Frenchman are all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze when, all of a sudden, Saudi police rush in and arrest them. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they are all sentenced to death! However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentences d…

Islamic joke I saw somewhere A man walking in New York’s Central Park sees a Rottweiler attacking a little girl. He subdues the dog and saves her life. A passing Fox News reporter says: “You’re a hero. Tonight’s TV news bulletin will say: ‘Brave New Yorker Saves Child.” The man replies: “I’m a tourist from Saudi Arabia.” That night the news on Fox TV says: “Islamic extremist kills New York dog.”

Donald Trump... -A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hits the Middle East. -Two million Muslims die and over a million are injured. -Iraq, Iran and Syria are totally ruined and the governments don't know where to start with providing help to rebuild. -The rest of the world is in shock. -Britain is sending troops to help keep the peace. -Saudi Arabia is sending oil & monetary assistance. -Latin American countries are sending clothing. -New Zealand and Australia …

Saudi Arabia is banning chess, calling it Haram. Reasons are : 1. Queen doesn't wear burkha. 2. Queen roams freely wherever it wants . 3. Queen is more powerful than King 4. Queen alone goes to other army's side 5. And.... Most importantly there's only one queen..

Saudi Arabia Where you can get caught with marijuana and still get stoned.

Madam Tussauds has closed down in Saudi Arabia. They found it was impossible to make a prophet.

People in Saudi Arabia don't like the Flintstones... But people in Abu Dhabi Doooo!!!!!