Road The Jokes

A Raven and a Buzzard... A raven and a buzzard are both sitting on a fence by the side of the road. The raven says to the buzzard ""why did the chicken cross the road?"" The buzzard replies ""I dunno, I suppose we were just lucky.""

A farmer named Paddy had a . . . A farmer named Paddy had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company. In court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Paddy. 'Didn't you say to the police at the scene of the accident that you were fine?' asked the solicitor. Paddy responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I'd just loaded my fav'rit cow, Bessie, into da... ' 'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer the question. Did…

A Newfoundlander is painting the dividing line on a road The first day, he paints 7km of lines along the road The second day he paints 4km of lines along the road And the third day he paints only 1km of lines along the road So the manager of the site calls the Newfoundlander into his office and sites him down. ""What's going on?"" He asks. ""The first day, you did great! The second day you did good, but today you just did terrible."" He states. ""What's going on?"" ""Well, each day, I have to wa…

A rich kid sees a poor kid kicking a can down the road The rich kid says ""Hey, you, what're you doing?"" The poor kid says ""Moving.""

A rope walked into a bar After a long, hard day of work, a piece of rope walked into a bar looking to relax and have a drink. As he walked in, he noticed several of the patrons eyeing him. He made his way to the bar, sat down, and motioned to the bartender. The bartender walked down to where the rope was sitting and lowered his voice, trying to avoid any additional attention. ""Look,"" the bartender said, ""I don't want any trouble here, but we just don't serve your type here, so do us all a fav…

A policeman pulled over a speeding car turned to the driver and said ""Do you understand that you were going 20 km/h over the speed limit down the centre of the road?"" The guy smiles and says ""Of course I did, that's what it said to do on my driver's license"" The policeman confused asks ""and where does it say that?"" The man hands over the paperwork and points out ""There, where it says tear along the dotted line""

Two dogs are standing beside a road... The first one goes, ""woof"", the second says, ""knock it off! That's all you said yesterday.""

A deer was trying to cross a busy road but the traffic was very heavy. After he had been trying unsuccessfully for five minutes, a bear walked past and said: "Excuse me, there's a zebra crossing a bit further along the road." The deer replied: "Well, I hope he's having better luck than I am!" Have you ever seen a butcher unloading the delivery van? They get out the side of a cow. Where's the other side? Is there a cow still grazing in a field with a side missing? Lee Evans