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Did you hear the joke about the UPS guy? So one day a UPS worker, Jim, gets an unusually large box to bring on his daily route. He checks the address, which was not in his assigned area. However, without thinking much of it, he starts driving there. As he pulls up to the curb he sees that the house looks deserted, with boarded up windows and a dead tree in the yard. Despite a little bit of superstitious fear, he manages to get the box to the door. When he rings the doorbell, he hears a creakin

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Do you suck ? A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die." As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms. While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?" "No!" she shrieked, aghast. So, he dropped her. As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do

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Fridays!! One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowingin despair, he has his first meeting with The Devil. The Devil: Why so sad? Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell. The Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here... Do you drink? Guy: Sure, I love to drink. The Devil: Well you're gonna love Mondays. On Mondays that's all we do is drink. Whiskey, brandy, rum, tequila, beer...we drink until we throw up and then we drink some more! It doesn't matter

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Hitler captures 5 Jews In a concentration camp Hitler catches 5 Jews and asks the first one : ~ How many meters high can you jump? ~ 1 meter, he answered as he was trembling. Hitler gives him one loaf of bread and asks the same question to the second Jew. ~ 2 meters...replies the second Jew. Hitler gives two loaves of bread and asks the same question to the third Jew. ~ 3 meters! responds quickly the third Jew. Hitler draws his gun and blows his minds in air. Now the Jews concerned ask

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Father, what causes arthritis? A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day. He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's shirt was stained, his face was full of bright red lipstick and he had a half-empty bottle of wine sticking out of his pocket. He opened his newspaper and started reading. A couple minutes later, he asked the priest, ''Father, what causes arthritis?'' ''Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, and contempt for your fello

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Smart Ass Out Of The Box Answers By Students Who Failed Q1. In which battle did Napoleon die? * his last battle Q2. Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? * at the bottom of the page Q3. River Ravi flows in which state? * liquid Q4. What is the main reason for divorce? * marriage Q5. What is the main reason for failure? * exams Q6. What can you never eat for breakfast? * Lunch & dinner Q7. What looks like half an apple? * The other half Q8. If you throw a r

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