Michelle Jokes

Obama, Michelle, and Oprah are on a plane together... .... Obama says, i can drop 1 $1,000 bill and make someone really happy! OK, Michelle says... I can drop 10 $100 bills and make 10 people really happy. I got you, Oprah says... I can drop 100 $10 bills and make 100 people happy! The pilot pops his head around the corner and says ""I can drop one plane and make a 155 million people happy"".

What is Michelle Obama's favorite vegetable? Baraccoli

A man walks into a fancy dress party carrying a woman on his back... The host asks the man why this is so. ""Oh, I'm a tortoise and this is Michelle"" says the man.

The Bubba Joke--long Bubba is talking to his friend in a bar and boasts to his friend that he knows everyone in the world. His friend, of course, doesn’t believe him. “If you know everyone in the world, name everyone in this bar.” Bubba proceeds to name everyone—Joey, Rachel, Sam, Johnny, Bart, until everyone is named. His friend is impressed, but then says, “Well, you may know everyone here but you can't know everyone—how about Clint Eastwood? Bubba claims he does. So they go to Clint Eastwood…

Billy Bob applying for a job... Billy Bob is applying for a job at this big company and after the preliminary interview, one of the HR managers tells him: "You know, we'd love to take you, Billy Bob, we really do, but there's so many people applying for this job and you don't have any experience and don't have much of an education - you would have to have some connections to get it." Billy Bob replies: "Well, I know the senator, does that help?" The managers obviously don't believe him, so t…

The Comical Conservative President Obama walks into a local bank in Chicago to cash a check. He is surrounded by Secret Service agents. As he approaches the cashier he says, "Good morning Ma'am, could you please cash this check for me?" Cashier: "It would be my pleasure sir. Could you please show me your ID?" Obama: "Truthfully, I did not bring my ID with me as I didn't think there was any need to. I am President Barack Obama, the President of the United States of AMERICA !!!!" Cashier: "Yes…

Halloween Joke This guy goes to a Halloween costume party, but he’s just wearing street clothes, and he has his girlfriend sitting on his shoulders. The host says to him, “Dude, this is a Halloween party! You’re supposed to be wearing a costume?” The guy replies, I am wearing a costume! I’m a snail!” “You’re a snail?” “Yeah, I’m a snail,” says the guy. Then he points to his girlfriend and says, “This is Michelle.”

When Trump visited the White House before his presidency... He asked then president Obama how he managed to run two successful terms. "Simple", Obama replied, "Just get an intelligent wife" "How do I know my wife is intelligent?" Trump asked. "Just ask her intelligent questions and if she answers correctly, then you know she is intelligent". Obama then called Michelle and asked "Darling, your parents have a child, the child is neither your sister nor your brother, who is the child?" "The c…

Barack Obama walks into a bar, but he is invisible. After attracting the bartender’s attention, the bartender says "Ok, I'll bite. Why are you invisible?" Barack says "Well, I found a bottle on the beach and...then I rubbed it." "And then...importantly...A genie came out." "The genie said I could have...3 wishes." For my first wish, I said "Let me say this, and this is profoundly important...I want Michelle to marry me...I love her,...and I think America will love her too." That wish was gr…

What did Barack Obama say to Michelle when he proposed to her? I don't want to be Obama self.

What did Barack Obama write inside his Valentines card? ""I'm glad I've got you Michelle; I didn't want to be Obamaself"

What did Donald Trump say to his wife Melania in the voting booth? Don't copy Michelle on this one.

How did Barack propose to Michelle? He got down on one knee and said

[NSFW] I met a girl called Michelle at a bar... Her: Hi

What did Barack say to Michelle when he proposed? ""I don't wanna be Obama self""

Mark and his friend Michelle go to a costume party. When they show up Michelle is clinging to Mark's back. Someone greets them and asks what they're supposed to be. Mark says that he's a snail. The other guy asks ""who's on your back?"" Mark replies ""Michelle""

What did the pirate name his pet clam? Michelle

How did Barack propose to Michelle? He got down on one knee and said: ""I don't want to be obamaself""

Do you know what the President said to Michelle when he proposed?,"I don't wanna be Obama self. P.S. I know it was super cheesy.

What does Melania Trump say to her speech writer?,"Thanks Michelle!

Oh, Obama's credit card was declined? Michelle must have called the bank and told them she was tired of her husband always "going Dutch."

What did Barack Obama say when he dropped his shell at the beach? Oh no Michelle !

What's Michelle Obama's favorite vegetable? Barackoli.

Do you know what the President said to Michelle when he proposed? I don't wanna be Obama self. P.S. I know, it was super cheesy.

What did Barack say to Michelle when he proposed? I don't want to be Obama self.