Lee Jokes

A Chinese kid was born before the due date..So his parents named him ""Sudden Lee!""

When Lee ate raw onions for a week what did he become? Lone Lee.

A man visits a Buddhist Monastery. (non racist version) A man is sent to China on business. On a day off he goes sightseeing. He gets hopelessly lost in the confusing Chinese roads and finds himself on the outskirts of town where an ancient Buddhist monastery sits. Curious, he goes in. A kindly monk takes him for a tour. In the courtyard of the monastery there is a pond, around which are several monks who are skipping stones. However, instead of typical splashes when the stones bounced acros…

Ving and Ling Earlier this year, a chinese family moved into my small town. The family had two twins who were both seniors in my class, Ving and Ling. Ving and his sister Ling were quiet to start off with, but eventually I made good friends with Ving. After talking to him for a few weeks he revealed to me that he absolutely *abhored* his name, and that he'd do almost anything to figure out how to get it changed. I asked him what he wanted to change it to, and he said "lee, like bruce lee …

I went to a high school with a set of Chinese twins... In high school, I was in class with a set of Chinese twins named Ving and Ling. Me and Ving got along pretty well, she'd help me with my trig and I'd help her with English. One day she asked me for help on changing her name. She didn't like the name Ving because it was too stereotypical. I would probably change my name too. She wanted to change her name to Lee, like Bruce Lee. Ling heard of this plan, and told Ving that her name was passed …

I once knew two Chinese twins... So in my calculus class last year in math, there were these two Chinese twins. Ving, and Ling. Ving was always super cool with me. In exchange for answers (he was super smart) I would hang out with him and be his friend and stuff. After I cheated off of him and studied with him though, I did get to be his friend and we got very close. His sister, Ling, was always uptight about school and she made sure to study, she got stressed about a B, etc. One day I was hang…

One day in math... ...we got two new transfer students. They were twins named Ving and Ling who had moved in from Korea. I sat next to Ving during class and I got to know him pretty well. We liked the same books, movies, games, you name it! At the end of the quarter, we had a huge unit exam, it was about 30% of our grade. Luckily, Ving let me copy off of him on one condition, I take him to get his name changed after school. The guy absolutely despises his name, he thinks it sounds too stereotyp…

Calculus Class So in my calculus class last year in math, there were these two Chinese twins. Ving, and Ling. Ving was always super cool with me. In exchange for answers (he was super smart) I would hang out with him and be his friend and stuff. After I cheated off of him and studied with him though, I did get to be his friend and we got very close. His sister, Ling, was always uptight about school and she made sure to study, she got stressed about a B, etc. One day I was hanging out with Ving,…

Ving and Ling #DISCLAIMER: This IS a repost. The original was from 4chan I think. I do not take any credit whatsoever. Earlier this year, a Chinese family moved into my small town. The family had two twins who were both seniors in my class, Ving and Ling. Ving and his sister Ling were quiet to start off with, but eventually I made good friends with Ving. After talking to him for a few weeks he revealed to me that he absolutely abhored his name, and that he'd do almost anything to figure out ho…

My Friend, Ving. So in my calculus class last year in math, there were these two Chinese twins. Ving, and Ling. Ving was always super cool with me. In exchange for answers (he was super smart) I would hang out with him and be his friend and stuff. After I cheated off of him and studied with him though, I did get to be his friend and we got very close. His sister, Ling, was always uptight about school and she made sure to study, she got stressed about a B, etc. One day I was hanging out with Vin…

What do you call a bear with martial arts skills? Grizz Lee. ^I'll ^see ^myself ^out.

A Chinese family moved into my neighborhood when I was in high school... They had a pair of twins, named Ving and Ling, who were my age. I liked Ving, but his sister Ling was kind of a bitch. Eventually, Ling told me that he hated his name, and he wanted to change it. I asked him, "What do you want to change your name to?" and he said "Lee. You know, like Bruce Lee?" Ling overheard, and chimed in, saying that their father would disown him if he changed his name. One day, Ving decided he had ha…

I don't like limericks generally, but here's a couple that I love A spiritual healer named Lee Ducked into an alley to pee He pissed in the eye Of a blind homeless guy who cried, "Holy shit! I can see!" There once was a poet named Stan Whose limericks never did scan When told this was so He'd reply, "yes, I know... ...but the thing is, you see, I've gone and gotten myself into this really rather ridiculous habit recently of always trying to cram as many completely unnecessar…

Bruce Lee was fast, but he had an even faster brother… Sudden Lee Edit: my first ever popular post came sudden lee. Thanks you all! And thanks for the silver and awards

Woman mistakes Lee Trevino for a migrant worker Lee Trevino is a Mexican-American who was one of the best golfers (and greatest characters) in the world. But when he was a young man, he would still mow his own lawn, and this is why. He was a young golfer on the PGA Tour, and a married man, when one day he was out mowing the lawn in front of his house in Dallas, as he always did. A woman drove up in a big, shiny Cadillac, rolled down her window and said, "Excuse me, do you speak English?" …

Today i have met the vegetarian brother of Bruce Lee Brocco Lee

What do you call a fir tree that knows kung fu? Spruce Lee

Lee has a terrible headache Lee calls in work and say ""I no come work today. I really sick

what do you call an Asian man who always has a correct change ? Exact Lee

What do you call an asian marksman? Precise Lee

There once was a fellow named Lee Who was plumbing his girl by the sea.

What do you call a prematurely born Chinese baby? Sudden Lee

Civil War spoilers Lee surrenders at Appomatox Courthouse

What do you call a bear with martial arts skills? Grizz Lee.

Civil War spoilers Lee surrenders at Appomatox Courthouse, Abe Lincoln is shot by John Wilkes Booth.