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Joseph Jokes

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The three wise men walk into a barn... ...and see Joseph, Mary, and baby Jesus. Joseph asks why they are disturbing them as his wife had just given birth and needed rest. The first wise man said ""I have brought gold for the child."" Joseph thanked him but ask that they leave. Then the second wise man said ""I have brought frankincense for the child."" Again Joseph thanked him but was getting annoyed as they were interrupting a special moment between him and his wife. He then, forcefully, asked

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A couple of years ago, one night, I was about to propose to my girlfriend... ...when my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere, tripped and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. Totally ruined the mood. Now, I didn't know Joseph *that* well, don't even remember where he was from, but let's just say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries. Joseph had gotten big glass shard in his eye, making him completely blind in that eye. He was walking around with one o

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One night, I was about to propose to my girlfriend. When my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere, tripped and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. Totally ruined the mood. Now, I didn't know Joseph THAT well, don't even remember where he was from, but let' just say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries. Joseph had gotten big glass shard in his eye, making him completely blind in that eye. He was walking around with one of those cotton pads on his eye

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Cotton eyed Joe. A couple of years ago, one night, I was about to propose to my girlfriend when my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere, tripped and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. Totally ruined the mood. Now, I didn't know Joseph THAT well, don't even remember where he was from, but let' just say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries. Joseph had gotten big glass shard in his eye, making him completely blind in that eye. He was walking around wi

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A couple of years ago, one night, I was about to propose to my girlfriend... ... when my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere, tripped and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. That totally ruined the mood. Now, I didn't know Joseph THAT well, don't even remember where he was from, but let' just say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries. Joseph had gotten big glass shard in his eye, making him completely blind in that eye. He was walking around with on

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I was about to propose to my girlfriend when my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere, tripped, and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. Totally ruined the mood. Now I don't know Joseph THAT well, don't even remember where he was from, but let's say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries. Joseph had gotten a big glass shard in his eye, making him completely blind in that eye. He was walking around with one of those big cotton pads on his eye for a coupl

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A couple of years ago, one night... I was about to propose to my girlfriend when my roommate Joseph barged into the room out of nowhere, tripped and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. Totally ruined the mood. Now, I didn't know Joseph that well, don't even remember where he was from, but let' just say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries. He had gotten big glass shard in his eye, making him completely blind in that eye. He was walking around with one of those cot

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Mrs. Rosenberg walks into a hotel and asks the guy behind the counter to put her up for the night. ""Name?"" he asks ""Mrs. Rosenberg"" she replies ""I'm sorry, ma'am, but we don't give out rooms to Jews."" ""Jews? Who's the Jew here? I am Catholic"" the woman yells. ""Oh really? Then please tell me who is the Son of God."" ""Jesus Christ"" the woman says. ""And who were his parents' names?"" ""Mary and Joseph"" ""And where was he born?"" ""In a barn where the animals were fed and bathed."" ""OK

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Jesus finds his father Works best in Italian Jesus walks along the street when he sees a sad old man sitting on a bench. He stops and asks him what his name is and why he is sad. The old man says his name is Giuseppe (Italian for Joseph) and he has lost his son. ""How do you recognize your son?"" ""He has nails in his hands and feet."" ""Father!"" ""Pinocchio!"" Edit : For those not getting this - Gepetto is an Italian diminutive for Giuseppe - Joseph. Gepetto was the wood carver who create Pino

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BIBLE - ""Believe in Big Lies, Everybody"". this is not meant to insult in anyway, only a joke my girlfriend made while drunk... thought id share. so we made a theory that actually mary cheated on joseph who believed her to be a virgin. and she called the kid jesus claiming a miracle and the kid believed it growing up. ""jesus"" never performed any miracles. all were hoaxes set up by mary herself to further make ""jesus"" believe he was son of god. the roman emperor caught on and met up with mar

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(NSFW) Jesus of Nazareth turn 18 So his dad Joseph takes him to a brothel for his birthday. Upon arriving the madam presents all the lady's of easy virtue. Time to become a man, says Joseph to Jesus. Pick a girl and follow her to her room. So Jesus picks a girl and follows her to her room. Joseph, exited from all the pretty lady's, also decides to have a go at it. So he picks a girl and follows her to her room and gets busy. Suddenly he hears chilling screams comming from Jesus' room. So he gets

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