Greece Jokes

The marriage A young women was marrying her Boyfriend from Greece. On the wedding night her mother gave her $1000 and told her "" If you and he are in bed, and he asks you to roll over, jump out of bed and buy the first plane ticket back home to me"". Everything went fine the wedding night, and for two years all was smooth sailing. But one night her husband asked her to roll over so she jumped out of bed and began packing. Her husband plead ""what's the matter, baby? Why are you leaving?"" and s…

The Price of Feta These Days... An old lady walks into a store in Greece, and picks up a small slice of Feta cheese. She goes up to the clerk, and puts 1 Euro on the counter to pay for it. ""Ma'am, Euros are useless. Your right hand would be worth more."" She then reaches into her great big handbag, and pulls out a hatchet.

socrates the philosopher . . . (fixed) Keep this in mind the next time you are about to repeat a rumor or spread gossip. In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day an acquaintance ran up to him excitedly and said, ""Socrates, do you know what I just heard about Diogenes?"" ""Wait a moment,"" Socrates replied, ""Before you tell me I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."" ""Triple filter?"" asked the acquaintance. ""That's …

Hey Reddit, what are your favorite kid jokes? You know, jokes that only kids tell each other. There are a few I remember from my childhood, for instance: How do you catch a seal? Drill a hole in the ice and line the opening with peas. When he comes out to take a pea,......grab him! What did Mr. Spock find in Jim Kirk's toilet? Captain's Log. Where were the first Chickens Fried? In Greece....... *Grease* Please, tell me a joke you were told as a child. If it is stupid and corny, all the better.

Robbing a bank in Greece is like raiding a food warehouse in Uganda. You look stupid and you get nothing out of it.

Thanksgiving in Bulgaria Obviously Thanksgiving is an American holiday. However, as a former soldier deployed to Southern Europe, I was given a week long pass during the week of Thanksgiving. I decided to go to Bulgaria. You know what the best thing about Thanksgiving in Bulgaria is? Bulgaria is next to Turkey and Greece.

Gay dude was reading a holiday brochure then he tells his partner, ""This year we should try Greece."" His partner looks up and ask him. ""Whts wrong with the Vaseline?""

I'm not really sure I'm understanding this financial crisis in Greece... It's all Greek to me.

Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you hear, or are out to repeat a rumor. In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance, who ran up to him excitedly and said, ""Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students...?"" ""Wait a moment,"" Socrates replied. ""Before you tell me, I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Test of Three."" ""Test of Three?"" ""That's correct,"" Soc…

Socrates the philosopher . . . Keep this in mind the next time you are about to repeat a rumor or spread gossip. In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day an acquaintance ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about Diogenes?" "Wait a moment," Socrates replied, "Before you tell me I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test." "Triple filter?" asked the acquaintance. "That's right," Soc…

The Geography of a man and women THE GEOGRAPHY OF WOMAN AND MEN The Geography of a Woman Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa . Half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally Beautiful! Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe. Well developed and open to trade, especially for someone of real value. Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain, very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty. Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece, gently aging but still a warm and desirable plac…

Making Sense of What's Happening in Europe A policeman enters an interrogation room, in Athens, Greece. He tells the perp: "You are accused of robbing the Bank of Greece, tell us where the money is!" The perp reaches into his pocket and takes out a five-euro note. "Here you go."

If I were to invade Djibouti... Do you think Greece would help? [read out loud]

Second Honeymoon Wife was reading a travel magazine and asked her husband.. "Honey, should we try Greece for our second honeymoon?" Husband replied "What's wrong with KY?"

Triple Filter Test!!! In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in the highest esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about your friend?" "Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before telling me anything I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test." ["Triple filter?"](http://smile.xonaki.com/Joke/EN?categoryCode=EN&jokeId=573) "That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk …

What's the capital of Greece? (x-post from /r/MeanJokes) About €10. DISCLAIMER: I heard this joke from /u/r4e3d2d2i8t5. All due credit to that person.

The Roman Achilles. As you know, there is a lot of crossover between Roman and Greek paganism and mythology. Jupiter in Rome was Zeus in Greece, for example. However, what you might not know is that the Heroes of Greece were also adopted into Roman culture. Odysseus was called Ulysses, Aeneas is a charecter in both the Illiad, a greek poem, and the Aeneid, a roman "sequel" so to speak. Quite little known however, is the Roman equivalent of Achillies, Bophadee. The stories are similar. His mot…

Greece announced they are going to default on their nearly 1.8 billion dollar loan Who would’ve thought the country that invented the philosophy major would be broke?

Explanation of the crisis in Italy & Greece. A small town in Italy twinned with a similar town in Greece. The Mayor of the Greek town visited the Italian town. When he saw the palatial mansion belonging to the Italian mayor he wondered how he could afford such a house. The Italian said; "You see that bridge over there? The EU gave us a grant to build a two-lane bridge, but by building a single lane bridge with traffic lights at either end this house could be built". Soon after, the Italian vis…

Eleven Years ago Greece won Euro 2004 Today, Greece would be happy with 2004 Euros.

What is the capital of Greece? $20 (A friend told me this a few days ago).

Greece is a good example of capital punishment.

The other day someone asked me what the capital of greece was.... My answer of "i dont know, about ten dollars?" was not acceptable.

The Greek Legal System A man and his wife were getting a divorce at a local court in Greece, but the custody of their children posed a problem. The mother jumped to her feet and protested to the judge that since she had brought the children into this world, she should retain custody of them. The man also wanted custody of his children, so the judge asked for his side of the story. After a long moment of silence, the man rose from his chair and replied, "Your Honor, when I put a coin into…

I'm Hungary Timmy: I'm Hungary, Mum: Why don't you Czech the fridge. Timmy: OK I'm Russian to the kitchen. Mum: Hmmm.. may be you'll find some Turkey. Timmy: Yeah but its all covered in Greece. yuck! Mum: There is Norway you can eat that. Timmy: I know, I guess I'll just have a can of Chile Mum: Denmark your name on the can. Timmy: Kenya do it for me? Mum: OK, I'm Ghana do it. Timmy: Thanks, i'm so tired Iran for an hour today Mum: It Tokyo long enough. Timmy: yeah Israe…