Baltimore Jokes

The mayor of Baltimore

I had a joke about the Baltimore Riots But someones already stolen it :(

What do you get when you burn Baltimore? Baltiless

What do you call a riot in Baltimore? Target practice.

RICE JOKES The Ravens should have known when Rice stopped hitting linebackers and started hitting cheerleaders. The Baltimore Ravens released Rice but I heard he will be picked up by the Chris Browns. Rice was just confused. His RB coach told him to hit the holes and he heard Hos. Baltimore's Chinese delivery drivers are all exhausted. Baltimore has banned rice from elevators. Dammit! Just last week I ordered a ""Ray Rice brings the pain!"" t-shirt for $50 and its not even here yet.

Topical Jokes for 6/13 A woman at an Arizona Burger King found a razor blade in her salad. Even more amazing, she found a salad inside a Burger King. A new study has discovered that dinosaurs were neither warm-blooded, nor cold-blooded. Which is the perfect dinosaur trivia, if you desperately need to end a conversation. The LA Kings have won the NHL championship in double overtime. The team celebrated by trying to trade the Stanley Cup for a pair of NBA playoff tickets. In Baltimore, police shot…

Izzard went into a Baltimore bank to cash his check. Since he didn't have an account there the teller asked if he could identify himself. ""Sure"" said Izzard. ""There a mirror around here?"" ""There's one on the wall right beside you"" said the clerk. Izzard took a glance in the mirror and heaved a sigh of relief. ""Yep!"" he said. ""It's me all right!""

If a woman is born in Italy grows up in England goes to America and dies in Baltimore what is she? Dead.

A friend went to the CVS in Baltimore after the looting to pick up some items, the only things left behind were sun tan lotion and father's day cards.

Rioters are destroying Baltimore. Don't worry though, all the bookstores are safe.

Baltimore, eat a snickers. You turn into Ferguson when you're hungry.

When the Baltimore rioters looted the CVS, they stole everything except for the Father's Day cards.

A lawyer boarded an airplane in Baltimore with a box of frozen soft shell crabs and asked a stewardess to take care of them for him. She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator.. He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer, and proceeded to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw out. Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior. Shortly bef…

I got jumped by five guys in Baltimore... They were real nice. Car started right up, and they even helped me with directions back to the interstate.

I got jumped by five black guys in Baltimore... They were real nice. Car started right up, and they even helped me with directions back to the interstate.

A lawyer boarded an airplane in Baltimore with a box of frozen soft shell crabs and asked a stewardess to take care of them for him.

Get rich quick scheme #12 Sell windows/glass in Baltimore

Baltimore eat a snickers.

Have you heard about the rioting in Baltimore? So far they've caused 4 million dollars in improvements.

I won a fight that was five against one in Baltimore today. We totally kicked the shit out of that guy.

Rioters are destroying Baltimore. Don't worry though

I got jumped by five black guys in Baltimore. The car started right up but they said I'd need a new battery.

What would you do of you found Chicago, Ill.?","Call Baltimore M.D.

What would you do of you found Chicago, Ill.? Call Baltimore, M.D.

How are all these African-American's able to take off time from work to riot in Baltimore? Wait... nevermind