Nhl Jokes

Who called it the NHL instead of the Just Ice League

I got a random wrong number call from a ""Blus Halilovec"" in California this afternoon. I pick up my phone--caller ID says it's someone from California called ""Blus Halilovec."" Before I can even say hello, this guy it slurring this long, drunken story about how he was kicked out of a bar while watching the NHL Winter Classic today, and could I come and give him a ride home? I try to say No, but the dude won't let me get in a word edgewise. He keeps calling me Lewis, too. Finally, he pauses af…

Seriously Funny 7 12 '16 Today's Amazon Prime Day or Christmas in July where you can get on-line deals on hundreds of items you didn't know you needed! Trump's considering Newt Gingrich for V.P. Good thinking. Nobody would ever assassinate Trump if it'd make Newt the President! Dietitians claim brighter colored food is better for you. That's it, I'm switching to Fruity Pebbles and Kool-aid for a healthier breakfast! Today's Inspirational Thought; Death is just God finally collecting on a prepaid…

NHL Stanley Cup Playoff Game 7 It's game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at centre ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbour if someone will be sitting there. ""No,"" says the neighbour. ""The seat is empty."" ""This is incredible,"" said the man. ""Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?"" The neighbour says, ""Well actually the seat belongs to me. I w…

I mean, NHL teams have father-son road trips all the time I don't think they're as common in the NBA though...

What's the difference between French women and an NHL hocky team? The hockey team showers after 3 periods.

What are your best Sports Team jokes? With the NHL season getting started tonight. I am wondering what are you best jokes making fun off sports teams. All Sports (Baseball,hockey,football, soccer etc).

Topical Jokes for 6/13 A woman at an Arizona Burger King found a razor blade in her salad. Even more amazing, she found a salad inside a Burger King. A new study has discovered that dinosaurs were neither warm-blooded, nor cold-blooded. Which is the perfect dinosaur trivia, if you desperately need to end a conversation. The LA Kings have won the NHL championship in double overtime. The team celebrated by trying to trade the Stanley Cup for a pair of NBA playoff tickets. In Baltimore, police shot…

Yo mama so ugly The NHL banned her for life

What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league? Rink injustice!

In the midst of the NHL Playoffs, here is my first r/Jokes submission. It's Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final, and a man makes his way to his seat right at center ice. He sits down, noticing that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone will be sitting there. "No" says the neighbor. "The seat is empty." "This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Stanley Cup and not use it?" The neighbor says, "Well, actuall…

Why won't women ever play in the NHL? Because the periods would take too long.

In the midst of the NHL Playoffs here is my first r/Jokes submission.

Why didn't Jesus ever play in the NHL? because every time he tried he got nailed to the boards!

What are your best Sports Team jokes?,"With the NHL season getting started tonight. I am wondering what are you best jokes making fun off sports teams. All Sports (Baseball,hockey,football soccer etc).

What will ESPN talk about if both the Hawks and Rockets make it to the NBA final? The NHL playoffs