Sarah Palin Jokes

Wife at dinner party: ""my husband is always calling me Sarah Palin"" Guests: ""that's funny, why does he call you Sarah Palin?"" Wife: ""because he hates Sarah Palin.""

Republican luminary Sarah Palin. If I have to explain then its not funny. If I have to explain then you most likely voted for the Republican luminary Sarah Palin.

Sarah Palin calls Diane Feinstein's office And says, ""Hello, may I please speak to Senator Feinstein?"" The secretary said, ""It's Rosh Hashanah, Senator Feinstein isn't here today."" Palin replied, ""Oh, hello Rosh, can you please take a message for me?""

Sarah Palin went Moose Hunting. It was a cold day in B.F.E, Alaska and Sarah Palin decided it was a perfect day to go moose hunting. The snow was fresh, making it easy to track the giant beasts if she were to be lucky enough to see one. She loaded up her snowmobile early in the morning, just before the sun rose. A couple miles into the trip, her snowmobile sputtered to a halt. Trying everything she could to get it going again, with zero luck and no cell phone reception, she gave up and decided t…

I heard they found the plane.. Well at least Sarah Palin tweeted that she could see the wreckage from her house.

(Request) My uncle is trying to remember a Sarah Palin joke about her having a kid with down syndrome. Comment them here and I'll pass em along. Thanks a bunch :)

Topical Jokes (5/25-5/26) Hey, sorry for the tardiness! Been on the road lately. Here's some jokes to cap up the last couple days. Governor Christie met with Snooki over the weekend, but things got a tad awkward when Christie licked his lips and asked, ""But seriously, are you actually a meatball?"" Big Catholic news, the Pope recently stated that it is possible for atheists to go to Heaven. However, what he didn't say is once they get there, they have to spend all eternity helping Buddha squeez…

Plane flight Mit Romeny, Sarah Palin and Barack Obama are flying ont the same plane and chatting: Romney: - if I would drop 1000$ down it would make one person happy! Palin: - If I would drop 1000$ in 100$ bills I would make 10 people happy! Obama: - I would drop you both from the plane it would make whole nation happy.

The Queens Riddle Barack Obama met with the Queen of Great Britain. He asked her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips you can give me?" "Well," said the Queen, "the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people." Obama frowned, and then asked, "But how do I know the people around me are really intelligent?" The Queen took a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy; you just ask them to answer an intelligent riddle." The Queen pushed a b…

Sarah Palin bought up all of Alaska's pancake mix She's trying to keep her son from battering women

So why did the chicken cross the road? SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because

What do Iron man and Sarah Palin have in common? They both had a little Downey inside of them.

How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house?,"She didn't it was just an Aleutian.

What do Sarah Palin and Iron Man have in common? ...they've both had a Downey Jr. inside them.

What do the Iron Man suit and Sarah Palin have in common? They've both had a downy inside em.

What's the most dangerous animal in Alaska? Sarah Palin

How did Sarah Palin see Russia from her house? She didn't, it was just an Aleutian.

Where do Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton go to worship? the olebitchuary

What does Sarah Palin eat when she's high? Baked Alaska

The 2008 US presidential election was too close to call. Neither the Republican nor the Democrat candidate had enough votes to win. There was talk about ballot recounts and court challenges, but finally both parties decided on a week-long ice-fishing competition, at the end of which whoever caught the most fish would be declared President. The contest was to take place on a frozen lake in North Minnesota. There were to be no observers present and both John McCain and Barack Obama were to go out …

Sarah Palin's chief adviser burst excitedly into her office one morning. "Governor," he beamed. "Some great news at last. Have you seen today's newspapers?" "I saw that there was a sale on at Bloomingdale's." "No, even better than that. According to a new post-election survey, people want you to run for President in 2012." The news was music to her ears. She stood up proudly and announced: "You mean I am the chosen one, the woman of the people? You say that thousands of Republicans have been ple…

While tending the hand wound of an old Texas rancher, a doctor struck up conversation with him and pretty soon the topic turned to Sarah Palin and her bid to become Vice-President of the United States. The old rancher said: "Palin is what I call a post turtle." Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a "post turtle" was. The rancher said: "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle." The doctor …

Three old ladies were sitting in their retirement home reminiscing. The first old lady recalled shopping at the greengrocer's, and demonstrated with her hands the length and thickness of a cucumber that she could once buy for a penny. The second old lady nodded, adding that onions also used to be much bigger and cheaper. She then used her hands to demonstrate the size of two big onions that she used to be able to buy for a penny each. The third old lady remarked: "I can't hear a word you're sayi…