Brooklyn Jokes

Three men die and go to heaven. When they arrive at the Pearly Gates they see St. Peter standing before them. The first man steps forward. "What did you do in your life?" Asked the saint. "I was a comedian," the first man said. "Really?" mused Peter. "What jokes did you tell?" "I told Jewish jokes." The man replied. "That's horrible!" Exclaimed Peter. "It's a terrible sin to discriminate against others." "With respect," the man replied, "I am Jewish. I was born in Brooklyn after my…

A Jewish businessman in Brooklyn A Jewish businessman in Brooklyn decided to send his son to Israel to absorb some of the culture of the homeland. When the son returned, the father asked him to tell him about his trip. The son said, "Pop, I had a great time in Israel. Oh, and by the way, I converted to Christianity." "Oh, my," said the father. What have I done?" He decided to go ask his old friend Jacob what to do. Jake said, "Funny you should ask. I too sent my son to Israel, and he a…

The man who stutters tremendously finds a horse... The man who stutters tremendously finds a horse on the street in Brooklyn. He decides call the police. Man: I've f-f-found a w-w-wandering h-h-horse. Policeman: Okay. We will come. Where are you now? Man: In Br-r ... (stutters tremendously) Policeman: Bronx? Man: Br-r ... Damn (hangs up because he can not speak anymore) He calls again. Man: I've c-c-called earlier a-a-about the h-h-horse. Policeman: Okay. Where are you? Man: In Br-r ... (stutte…

I like to be frank and earnest with women. In Brooklyn, I'm Frank and in Chicago I'm Ernest.

Wise Italian Grandfather An old Italian man in Brooklyn is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, "Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me." "But grandpa, I really don't like guns. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?" "You lissina me, boy! Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos. " "Somma day you gonna come-a ho…

A Jewish gentleman walks into a New York bar with a frog on his shoulder. The barman looks up and says" Hey, where'd ya find that?" The frog replies, "Brooklyn, there's thousands of em"

Sandbox Humor First-grade class in Brooklyn comes in from recess. Teacher asks Sarah: ""What did you do at recess?"

The Devil burst through the floor of a church in Brooklyn He starts roaring and shouting in everyone's face saying

So there's two guys from Brooklyn. Two guys from Brooklyn attend a special party in Manhattan. It's a costume party where you are supposed to come dressed up as your emotion. So this guy is dressed in all red because he's angry. Another dude is green

The man who stutters tremendously finds a horse... The man who stutters tremendously finds a horse on the street in Brooklyn. He decides call the police.

I like to be frank and earnest with women. In Brooklyn

What do pantyhose and Brooklyn have in common? Flatbush

Where is the only place engineers are considered artistic? Brooklyn

What do Brooklyn and tight jeans have in common? Flatbush.

What do Brooklyn and pantyhose have in common? Flatbush.

Brooklyn was stuck with his math homework. "Dad," he yelled, "will you help me with my homework?" "I don't know, son," said David. "It wouldn't really be right, would it?" "Probably not," said Brooklyn. "But have a go anyway." BIRDS

David Beckham was walking down a Los Angeles street with his son Brooklyn when he passed a fast food outlet with a sign outside saying, "Free Big Mac." David turned to Brooklyn and said: "I wonder what he did?"