Athens Jokes

Knock knock -Knock knock. -Who's there? -Athens. -Oh no, it's the polis!

Why are people in Athens so fat ? Coz they have lot of greece in their food .

Alexis Tsipras walks into a bar in Athens... ...and orders a sandwich with tzatziki. The bartender quickly scurries off to prepare it. Once returned to the register, he says: ""Here you are, one gyro. Is that for here or to go?"" Unfazed, Tsipras grabs the sandwich and heads for the door. ""Wait! what about the bill?!?"" cries the bartender. The Prime Minister pauses, then smirks and sneers: ""Haven't you seen the news? I don't have to pay this euro bill. Besides it's called a 'drachma'""

A man in Athens gets a barrel of olive oil poured over him... ""Covered in grease in Greece."" For some reason this happens to more and more people... ""Covered in grease in Greece increase."" The news papers report on this phenomenon... ""Covered in grease in Greece increase covered.""

Questions and answers from Radio Athens Question: Is it true that there are two kinds of people serving as deputies of the European Parliament, as members of the European Commission, as members of the Permanent Representations of the Member States to the European Union and as members of the national Parliaments? Answer: Yes, it is absolutely true. One kind is those not capable of anything at all, and the other, those capable of anything whatsoever. Question: Is it possible for Switzerland to joi…

Plato and Aristotle were in the music room of the Academy in Athens. Plato was at the piano, and Aristotle was holding a small lute in his hands. ""Plato, do you know the unpredictability and exactitude of ethics and reflective philosophical hermeneutics require phronesis as an ontological counterpoint to peripatetic conjecture?"" ""No,"" Plato replied. ""But if you play a few bars, I may be able to pick it up.""

Chancellor Angela Merkel visits Athens. Angela Merkel arrives at the Athens airport & stops by the immigration check. ""Nationality?"" asks the Immigration officer. ""German,"" she replies. ""Occupation?"" he asks. ""No, just visiting for a few days.""

After his legs had been broken in an accident, Mr. Miller sued for damages, claiming that he was crippled and would have to spend the rest of his life in a wheelchair. Although the insurance company doctor testified that his bones had healed properly and that he was fully capable of walking, the judge decided for the plaintiff and awarded him $500,000. When he was wheeled into the insurance company office to collect his check, Miller was confronted by several executives. ""You're not getting awa…

Did you know that Vaseline was invented in Athens over 2000 years ago? It’s ancient grease

How do they separate the men from the boys in Athens? With a crowbar.

Knock Knock Who's there? Athens! Athens who? Athens I love you! 1660. Knock Knock Who's there? Atlas! Atlas? Atlas it's the weekend! 1661. Knock Knock Who's there? Atomic! Atomic who? Atomic ache!