Asia Jokes

I asked my racist granddad what does he think should be illegal... His reply, quite unsurprising, was ""Youth in Asia"" .

My neighbor is a veterinarian I can never tell whether he's talking about putting an animal to sleep or the ""youth in Asia.""

Where should we look to stem global overpopulation? The youth in Asia.....

Japanese boy kills his grandfather... Pfft, youth in Asia.

what do you call somebody who hates shoes from Asia? A lacist.

A friend of mine is really set on becoming the first emperor of Asia, He's pursuing a PhD in English Literature... When I asked him why chose English Literature he said he wanted to be ""a great reader"".

Three blind ______ In Asia, its not 3 blind mice. It's 3 blind rice.

In regards to those who lost a loved one to the Air Asia flight disaster... Don't worry there are plenty of fish in the sea. (Too soon?)

Air Asia Accident - java reference So some remains of the Air Asia Airline were found in the Java sea. Guess the pilot didnt C#.

Milk cartons in Asia have missing planes on them instead of children.

Not a mean plane joke. Wouldnt want to make a joke about the air asia flight as it would be plane wrong and offensive.

Did you hear about the mishap at the Asia Summit? The Chinese government is seeking answers after the recent Beijing Conference. Apparently, several of Obama's and Putin's private bodyguards were the last to use one of the royal toilets before it was reported clogged. Obama announced that he will ask congress to create a commission to investigate the incident while Putin denies that his forces ever entered the bathroom.

What do they call deepthroating in Asia? They don't have a word for it.

My wife was thinking of names for a new face cleanser she made. She made a face cleanser that is influenced by Asian ingredients. It makes you stay young for way beyond your years so she was thinking about calling it Youth in Asia.

An Anecdote from Central Asia Nasreddin Hodja, a man known for his sharp wit [and constant trolling of everyone around him], had borrowed a cauldron from his neighbor. When he didn't return it for a long time, the neighbor came knocking on the door. ""Hodja Effendi, if you are finished with the cauldron could I take it back? The wife needs it today."" ""Ah, of course,"" Hodja said, ""just wait here a minute and I'll fetch it."" When Hodja came back to the door with the cauldron, the neighbor not…

A panda walks into a restaurant and orders a meal. After the meal the waiter comes to the table to give the panda the check. Without a word the panda draws a gun and shoots the waiter dead. He then gets up nonchalantly and heads for the door. Seeing what just transpired the manager confronts the panda at the door. "" Hey, you just shot my waiter and didn't even pay for your meal!"" screams the manager. The panda replies ""I'm a panda, it's what I do. Look it up."" As the panda walks out the door…

Father and son talking: - Daddy, is it true that in some parts of Africa and Asia a man does not know the wife until marrying her? - Here too, my son. Here too ...

For some reason the Pope didn't... sponsor my program for terminally ill Chinese children. He said he didn't like the name - What's wrong with "Youth in Asia"???

What's the heaviest soup in Asia? Wonton soup!

A panda walks into a restaurant A panda walks into a restaurant and orders a meal. After the meal the waiter comes to the table to give the panda the check. Without a word the panda draws a gun and shoots the waiter dead. He then gets up nonchalantly and heads for the door. Seeing what just transpired the manager confronts the panda at the door. " Hey, you just shot my waiter and didn't even pay for your meal!" screams the manager. The panda replies "I'm a panda, it's what I do. Look it up." …

A Polish guy finds a lamp buried in the sand As per usual, a genie comes out and offers him three wishes. The Polish guy things for a moment and says, "I wish for all of Ghengis Khan's armies to go rampaging across the steppes to the border of Poland, then turn around and go home." "All right," the genie says, "Done. What's your second wish?" "I wish for all the Mongol hordes of Asia to go rampaging across the steppes to the border of Poland, then turn around and go home." "Are you sure?" a…

Who performs the most assisted suicides. Youth in Asia.

A rich man decides to visit Europe After a few weeks, he received a message from his butler simply saying, "Your dog is dead." Upon his return, the rich man began to scold the butler for how poorly he had handled the situation. "How should I have handled it sir?" The butler asked. "Well, you could have started with, your dog is on the roof. Then you could have sent another that said, your dog has fallen off the roof and is grievously wounded. Finally, you could have sent another that said, your…

Women are alot like continents. At various times in her life, a woman is like the continents of the world. From 13 to 18, she's like Africa- virgin territory. From 18 to 30, she's like Asia- hot and exotic. From 30 to 45, she's like America- fully explored and free with her resources. From 45 to 55, she's like Europe- exhausted, but not without places of interest. From 55 onwards, she's like Australia- everybody knows it's down there, but nobody cares.

Two Students from Asia Came to My High School... They were twins