I'm thinking about getting a dog from Asia. Instead of eating your homework, they actually do it for you.

A Panda Bear walks into a bar... The Panda sits down and says, ""Hey, Barkeep can I get a beer and a cheeseburger."" The bartender gets him his food and tells the Panda to enjoy. Th Panda eats his burger drinks his beer. After his beer he stands up pulls a gun out of his fur and shoots everyone in the bar besides the bartender. The bartender says, ""Hey Panda! Why did you kill my customers?"" The panda says, ""Look me up in the encyclopedia"" and leaves the bar. After that the bartender grabs hi…

Joe: I was shocked when I heard the perverted part in Handel's Messiah. Moe: Perverted part? What are you talking about? Joe: Where it goes ""For we like sheep."" It wasn't kind of me to mention this: for the rest of your life, you'll think of this dumb joke whenever you listen to Messiah, unavoidably visualizing men in middle eastern garb getting busy with sheep. It's like hearing euthanasia as youth in Asia. Dang, unkind again.

A panda walks into a restaurant and orders a meal. After the meal the waiter comes to the table to give the panda the check. Without a word the panda draws a gun and shoots the waiter dead. He then gets up nonchalantly and heads for the door. Seeing what just transpired the manager confronts the panda at the door. "" Hey, you just shot my waiter and didn't even pay for your meal!"" screams the manager. The panda replies ""I'm a panda, it's what I do. Look it up."" As the panda walks out the door…