Ac Jokes

Who, you ask, turns the AC on during a polar vortex? Sociopaths, fascist dictators, my boyfriend.

(Breaks car window to save a dog) Guy: I'm in the car! Me: Yeah but it's hot Him: The AC is on! Me: Can I get in? It's really hot out here.

Thanks, meeting venue that turns off the AC in the restrooms--I love emerging from taking a dump looking like I just ran a marathon!

A blonde is driving her car down a desert road in Nevada to meet up with her family. The heat starts to get to her and so she turns on the AC, and changes the channel on the radio so that she maybe distracted from a long winded journey. As she looks back up onto the windshield a cat lays in the middle of the road and she swerves to avoid it. The car flips and is wrecked. The doors fall of the hinges, the hood exposes the engine, and the tires have all blown out. However, the blonde is unharmed. …

A land whale walks into a restaurant After this fat man sits down, he calls a waiter over and orders a sumptuous meal and a jumbo ""diet"" coke. He then calls the waiter over and says: ""Hey waiter! Turn up the AC! It's too damn hot!"" The waiter, being a compliant worker, heads back and emerges after a minute. After a few minutes, the man then calls the waiter over and says: ""Waiter! Now it's too damn cold! Turn the AC off!"" Again, the waiter happily strolls back to the kitchen and returns af…

Why did the AC wave try to hang himself? He was sinusoidal.

I used to so drugs in the 90s but now I usually turn the AC on

The engineer that went to hell. One day an engineer died and went to hell. He was a good Christian man who never sinned but Saint Peter made a mistake and accidentally sent him to hell. In hell the engineer thought to himself, "gee, it sure is hot in here", and so he built some air-conditioning. Then he thought, "I sure am thirsty", and built a brewery and started making beer. Later God and Saint Peter were reviewing the list of people who had died recently and God noticed that Peter had …

There was man whose wife was always trying to save money. She used coupons, barely ran the AC, and stuff like that... ...She also didn't like to use the car much, to save on gas, tires, brakes, etc. Her habit annoyed her husband sometimes. One day while taking the bus home from work, the man noticed that there was often a lot of traffic and he wondered if he could run home just as fast as the bus takes him. So the next day he decided to try it. After work, he headed over to the bus stop, sat do…

A church had their AC stolen The next day there was a note on the church doors reading: ""Dear thief! Keep the AC you stole

Wife:Isn't hot in here hun?,"Troll husband : It kinda is ill adjust the AC.

Why is B so cool? Because it is next to the AC

Wife:Isn't hot in here hun? Troll husband : It kinda is, ill adjust the AC.

Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?" Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about." Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?" Operator: "I think it means the telephone plug on the wall!”