An elite club in New York City hosts its annual banquet... It is known for upholding a number of very picky rules, notably a strict dress code. Justin Timberlake walks to the door wearing a sports coat and khakis. The bouncer says, ""You didn't meet the dress code. Please leave."" Leonardo Dicaprio walks to the door wearing a collared shirt, formal pants, and a tasteful bowtie; However, once again, the bouncer says, ""You didn't meet the dress code. Please leave."" Barack Obama and his entourage…

Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, and Barack Obama walk into a liquor store. Tiger Woods brings his alcohol up to the counter, and the clerk asks him for ID. Tiger tells the clerk he doesn't have any, but can't she tell he's Tiger Woods? The clerk says sure but I have to have some definite proof. So Tiger goes out to his car, grabs a pitching wedge, and brings it into this store. Tiger precedes to hit a ball 20 feet into a cup without even knocking it over. Clerk says 'Alright take your alcohol.' Mic…

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops at three ho's.

If Tiger Wood and Princess Diana played a round of golf who would win? Tiger Woods! because he has a better driver! I'll be in hell if you need me.