Patty the Irishman was drinking at his favorite watering hole... When George the bartender looked up, ""Patty it's closing time, get yer ass home Elaine is going to have your head!"" ""Oh I know, I know."" Patty got up, and immediately fell down. He crawled to the door, pulled himself up on the handle and fell through the door to the sidewalk outside. He made it to a parking meter and pulled himself up again, the whole way home Patty kept falling and getting back up. He finally made it home, he …

Look inside her mouth George found Tim, lying beside the road after a car accident. Tim was crying hysterically. George stopped his car and ran to him. ""Tim! Are you all right?"" Sobbing, Tim moaned, ""Look at my new car!"" pointing to it, wrapped around a tree. ""Hey, man. Don't cry. You can always get another car."" ""But look inside the car."" George did and said, ""Aw, dude, that's terrible. But don't cry! You can always get another girlfriend."" Tim wailed, ""Look inside her mouth!""

a few lighter-side ""yo momma"" jokes in general, the vast majority of ""yo momma"" jokes I hear are simply nasty or mean, with the only ""humour"" lying in the gross factor and/or the insulting nature of the dig (obviously those belong in /r/insults). but every now and then I hear a good one that makes me genuinely laugh, usually because of a silly and/or unexpected element. here's a selection: yo momma's so short on her driver's license picture you can see her feet yo momma's glasses are so th…

Costume Party A man and his wife have been invited to a costume party for Halloween, however on the night of the event the wife says to her husband that she can't go because she feels ill and needs to lie down. The husband asks if she wants him to stay at home, but not wanting to ruin her husbands evening says she'll be fine at home. Soon after the man puts on his costume and leaves to go to the party. About an hour or so later the wife wakes up feeling much brighter, she decides to surprise her…