Patty the Irishman was drinking at his favorite watering hole... When George the bartender looked up, ""Patty it's closing time, get yer ass home Elaine is going to have your head!"" ""Oh I know, I know."" Patty got up, and immediately fell down. He crawled to the door, pulled himself up on the handle and fell through the door to the sidewalk outside. He made it to a parking meter and pulled himself up again, the whole way home Patty kept falling and getting back up. He finally made it home, he opened the door and fell on the steps leading upstairs, so he decided to crawl up them, and as quietly as he could crawl into bead with his poor wife Elaine. The next morning Patty woke up to a slap across the face, ""Patty O'Doyle! You went out drinking last night didn't you?!"" ""No Elaine, I swear on me stars! No drinking, not a drop!"" ""Then explain why George called this morning asking when I was gonna come pick up your wheelchair?!""