Virginia Jokes

A pregnant woman was involved in a car accident A pregnant woman from Virginia was involved in a car accident and, while in the hospital, she fell into a coma. When she awoke days later, the woman noticed that she was no longer carrying a child, and asked, "Doc, what happened to my baby!" The doctor replied, "Ma'am, you've had twins! You're the proud mother of a handsome baby boy and a beautiful baby girl. Also, you should know that while you were in a coma, your brother named the children fo…

hillbilly went hunting A hillbilly went hunting one day in West Virginia and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his pickup truck and was about to drive home when he was confronted by an ornery game warden who didn't like hillbillies. The game warden ordered the hillbilly to show his hunting license, and the hillbilly pulled out a valid West Virginia hunting license. The game warden looked at the license, then reached over and picked up one of the ducks, sniffed its butt, and said, "T…

A couple of Italian guys are discussing who, if they could choose any woman in the world, they'd rather bang One of them says some big name actress, the other says "Virginia Pippilini." The first guy's like, "Who's that? Is she a model?" "I don't know" "Actress?" "I don't know." "Singer?" "I don't know." "Well if you don't know, why choose her?" The guy pulls out a newspaper and points to the headline. "Virginia Pipeline blows 50 men dead."

The hunting license A hunter went hunting one day in West Virginia and bagged three ducks. He put them in the bed of his pickup truck and was about to drive home where he was confronted by an ornery game warden who didn't like hunters. The game warden ordered to the hunter to show his hunting license, and the hunter pulled out a valid West Virginia hunting license. The game warden looked at the license, then reached over and picked up one of the ducks, sniffed it's butt, and said, \- "T…

An American politician and a Russian politician are having dinner They are eating at the American politician's house in suburban Virginia. A 6 bedroom house with a 2 Mercedes Benz at the front. And a 500 square foot garden. The Russian politician remarked how nice his house was and how he was able to afford it. The American politician said: "see that highway over there? It was meant to have 4 lanes instead of three" A few months later the Russian politician invited the American over to his d…

A pregnant woman from Virginia was involved in a car accident and

A pregnant woman was involved in a car accident A pregnant woman from Virginia was involved in a car accident and

Where was the toothbrush invented?,"West Virginia anywhere else it would be called the teethbrush

Did you hear about Elon Musk's X in Virginia? They had a firey start, then a major break up.

Introductory Chemistry was taught at Duke University for many years by professor Bonk. One year, two guys took the class and did pretty well on all the quizzes and mid-terms--so much so that going into the final, they each had a solid A. These two friends were so confident going into the final that the weekend before finals, despite the Chemistry final being on Monday, they decided to go to the University of Virginia to party with some friends. They did this and had a great time. However, with t…

Tennessee folks make fun of their northern Virginian neighbors with this quip: You know why birds fly upside down over Scott County, Virginia? "Cause there ain't nothin' worth shittin' on up there!"