NASA Jokes

What do you call gas from the human body that NASA could impliment into fuel for their technology in the future? Rocket Farts.

What on Earth did the NASA discover? Nothing, it was on Mars

Today, my teacher stated that he used to work for NASA. He told that class that he became a teacher because it paid more.

Just watched The Martian I found it odd that NASA would commission SpaceX to make the Iris probe.

If NASA are ever going to send someone to mars to collect water samples, They're going to have to planet very carefully!

mars: I'm wet.... NASA: I'm coming over!

NASA Says Signs of Water Flowing on Mars, Possible Niches for Life Willing to take a bath in that following water in Mars.

NASA confirms, life found on mars.

NASA recently confirmed what I've always suspected ...even Mars has more flow than Kanye West.

Why does NASA throw the best parties.... they make sure to planet

Come on guys! Give us your best ""Your Momma"" jokes! * Your momma is so fat that NASA uses her for gravity assist maneuvers. * Your momma is so fat that her belly button is an event horizon. * Your momma is so fat and old that once when she tripped and fell over , the moon was created. * Your momma is so fat that I can see what's behind her due to gravitational lensing. * Your momma is so fat that she is considered to be a viable candidate for the recolonization of the human race once we have d…

Please help little Billy Evans. My name is Billy Evans. I am a very sick little boy. My mother is typing this for me, because I can't. She is crying. The reason she is so sad is because I'm so sick. I was born without a body. It doesn't hurt, except when I try to breathe. The doctors gave me an artificial body. It is a burlap bag filled with leaves. The doctors said that was the best they could do on account of us having no money or insurance. I would like to have a body transplant, but we need …

space place Three years after the launch of the Mars rover, NASA had chosen to sent a cat up to check levels on the surface of the planet. It took the space pod over a week to get to Mars and land successfully and alive. The rover eventually met with the cat only to then deem the cat an intruder to its ""home"" and probably ran over it. So you could say curiosity did in fact kill the cat.

What's the difference between an astronaut and a NASA intern? One's constantly preparing for lunch.

A woman bursts out laughing in a NASA control room witnessing a comet on an impact course with Earth. Director: Margaret, this is beyond catastrophic, what on Earth are you laughing at ? Woman: Sorry, it's just the comet reminds me of my husband. Director: What are you talking about ? Woman: Well, it's coming too quickly.

Why did NASA hire a proctologist? To help plan the trip to Uranus.

How does NASA prepare for an organized event? They planet!

TIL: There is a chemical compound that can be extremely deadly to humans, is most of the time in food, and is not always government regulated. Each year, Dihydrogen Monoxide is a known causative component in many thousands of deaths and is a major contributor to millions upon millions of dollars in damage to property and the environment. Some of the known perils of Dihydrogen Monoxide are: Death due to accidental inhalation of DHMO, even in small quantities. Prolonged exposure to solid DHMO caus…

Two men walk in to a candy factory. They ask for the oompa loompas. Everyone looks slightly offended. So they call NASA, and ask for a space exploration team to look for oompa loompas. NASA replied, ""We are a space agency that doesn't go in to space."" They build a spaceship out of chinese fireworks and go to space themselves, but forget life support and shred in to a million pieces. The pieces fall down to earth and are made in to candy. Every day this happens thanks to a cloning machine. This…

What do you call a space agency that doesn't go to space? NASA.

Your mama so fat that NASA thought they found a new planet Dad stop it.

According to NASA Size DOES matter.

In honor of The Challenger disaster: proof that I have no soul. How do we know Christa McAuliffe had dandruff? Her head and shoulders washed up on the shore. It was said that Christa's pupils were hit the hardest... by the instrument panel. As she left for work that day she said to her husband ""you feed the dog, i'll feed the fish."" How do you know her eyes were blue? One blew one way the other blew another way. Christa used to teach Social Studies ...now she's History What does NASA stand for…

NASA's budget has dramatically increased by 1000 times it was last year.(non seirous duel party joke) January 1st 2015 NASA and reasonable science enthusiasts has for decades been begging the capital hill for an increase in funds to do what they need to be able to do, and capital hill replied for decades ""We'll think about it."" Now it has happened at an unexpected rate. An earlier agreement that capital hill head among both parties was to fund various projects towards the development of the ""…

How does NASA organize their Christmas party? They planet