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Japan Jokes

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Chickens are Illuminati As of 2011 there is an estimated 19 billion chickens in the world or 3 for every person. What has 3 sides? A triangle. Where can you see triangles? The pyramids. Where are the pyramids? Egypt. What did Egyptians worship? Cats and dogs. Cats and dogs are rivals such as chickens and turkeys. When do people eat turkey the most? Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is a few weeks away from Christmas in the USA. What's on the other side of the world from the USA? Japan. What do Japanese

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Home Depot A man walks into a bar and orders a drink. While he's waiting he sees another man sitting across from him who looks up and asks, ""What are you looking at?"" The first man says, ""Nothing."" At that point, the second man jumps up and beats the shit out of the first man and knocks him out, he then looks at the bartender and says, ""When he wakes up, tell him that was Jujutsu from Japan. The next day, bruised and sore, the man returns to the bar, sees the man who beat him up and approac

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Three men in an airplane... **My brother just reminded me of this joke I used to tell back in 2nd grade like 20 years ago:** There are three men in an airplane: a Russian guy, a Japanese guy and an American. As the plane is flying over Russia, the Russian says ""I love my country so much I'll drop a nickel."" So he drops a nickel and parachutes down and sees a girl crying. ""What's the matter little girl?"" ""My dad is choking on a nickel and he's dying!"" she exclaims. Back in the airplane, now

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International relations The United Nations noticed that there was a lot of dissent among its ranks and relationships were strained. The UN leaders called a meeting and came up with a plan to increase morale that was discussed and agreed upon by all members. The plan was to take a representative from three different countries and place them on a deserted island for a year. They asked for volunteers. The representative from Greece stood up and shared how one of their own should be on the island be

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The New Samurai The head samurai of Japan has died, the Emperor is searching for a replacement. He puts out word that all should try out to become the next head of the samurai. 3 men show up, a Samurai from China, a Swordsman from Mongolia and a Jewish samurai. The emperor greats the Chinese samurai and tell him to show his skills. He opens a small wooden box releasing a fly. He proceeds to slice the fly in half. The emperor is impressed and calls upon the Mongolian samurai. The Mongolian also o

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An international women's conference was held. One segment dealt with marital relations of newly married housewives and working husbands. The segment feature three recently married housewives from three different countries. The first speaker was from the USA. She recounted how after she married, she told her husband she didn't know how to mop floors. For two days the husband could see that that it was true. His new bride could not mop a dirty floor clean. So on the third day the husband bought hi

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Three leaders of nations are on a plane... Barack Obama, Shinzo Abe (PM of Japan), and Bashar Al-Assad (Syrian president) are cruising in Air Force One. As they're flying over the US, Barack turns to the other two and says ""This is how much I love my people"" and throws a quarter out of the plane. When they're over Japan, Shinzo says ""Well this is how much I love my people"" and throws a bag filled with 100 yen coins out of the plane. Over Syria, Bashar says ""Oh yea? Well this is how much I l

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John Smith started the day early having set his alarmclock (MADE IN JAPAN ) for 6 am .. While his coffeepot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN HONG KONG) He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes (MADE IN KOREA) After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA) he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today. After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIW

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