Facebook Jokes

Hoes looking for attention... Haters looking for a mention... Welcome to Facebook.

Facebook is basically just you having a conversation with yourself hoping that someone else will join in.

Karen on Facebook says, ""2014 is going sooooo well!"" Personally, I've already fcuked up 2014, and a good chunk of 2015, so go fcuk yourself Karen.

Back in the day I was attracted to this chick but never had enough guts to ask her out but after witnessing first hand the drama she creates on Facebook I am glad I dodged that bullet.

Why do people post missing person posts on Facebook? Like we're going outside...

In case of emergency, exits can be located at the log out, delete, deactivate, hide and block features. Thank you for flying with Facebook

If you want to cry use a tissue, not your Facebook status.

If you're reading this you're probably addicted to the internet. And by internet, I mean Facebook.

If only they had and Olympic event for Facebook, my FB friend would win Gold everytime in the Drama event.

A recent study estimated that 8% of all Facebook accounts are fake... unless you count people's personalities, then that number jumps to 93%.

Facebook is in a relationship with the stock market and it's complicated.

Needs a Facebook button that says What you just posted makes me want to punch you in the face. Put it beside the Like button. Just a suggestion.

How embarrassing would it be if Facebook automatically updated statuses to what you where doing. ""Billy is alone in his room.""

If Facebook has proved ANYTHING, it's that the love of your life is someone you've never actually met.

If you're constantly posting ""loving my life!"" as your Facebook status, you're probably not.

What's the point of a high school reunion? I have Facebook. I already know you got Fat

Everyone has at least one friend who treats their Facebook status like their therapist.

Its no longer the little birdy that told you something. now days its ""i seen it on facebook.""

People nowadays take pictures, not for memories, but to post them on Facebook and get comments.

Best Way to deal with High School Bullies: Grow up to be smarter, richer and better looking than them and then add them on Facebook.

""I wish there was a more convenient way to stalk others""- The phrase that started Facebook

I just wanted you all to know that I'm leaving Facebook. The ride has been a blast and I've made a ton of friends. Your humor and wit is amazing. I'll miss all of u, but I've decided I need to spend more time with my family...so see you after breakfast!!

Facebook needs a Drama of the day section in my news feed.

Oh look, it's raining outside. I think I'll go on Facebook and update all my friends that don't have a window of their own.

I can see you're upset. Maybe you should post more about it on Facebook. That should eliminate any more drama.