Carter Jokes

[Long] A story of how two wooden planks became best friends Once upon a time, there were 2 wooden planks. The first one was named Chad, the second was named Carter. Chad hated Carter, and Carter hated Chad even more! One day, Chad was in a bar, drinking a tequila. Carter, drunk, came over to Chad and punched him as hard as a wooden plank could. Chad got angry and retaliated, kicking Carter in the face. They got into a bloody and violent bar fight. They both got arrested. They were sentenced to 8…

Which U.S Presidents are not buried inside the United States? Carter, the Bushes, Clinton, and Barry-O

An older Russian joke, feel free to swap the leaders' names Leonid Brezhnev is visiting Jimmy Carter in Washington DC. Upon arriving in the oval office he is surprised by the luxury and asks: ""The Soviet people would love to know how can your government afford such niceties in the middle on an oil crisis."" Carter responds with ""Walk to the window with me. Do you see that bridge in the distance?"" ""Sure"" ""When we set out to build it, we had a budget of 100 million dollars. Through clever ma…

My Grandpa's Story My Grandpa used to drive big rigs from Western New York out to Los Angeles during the depression. He often told us the story of how he once was driving through backwoods Nebraska. He had to pull over to relieve himself so he got out of his rig and stepped into a field. He kicked at a bush and out popped a snake. My Grandpa was afraid of snakes and tried kicking it in an attempt to kill it until the snake shouts ""Stop!"" My Grandpa being stunned that he's come across a talking…