A man named John dies and goes to heaven. He arrives at the pearly gates and sees Peter. John goes up to Peter and says ""Where's God?"" Peter replies, ""The Lord has some business to do so I'm filling in for him. Do you want to take a tour of heaven?"" John says ""Sure!"" Peter and John go around heaven and see everything there is to see. John sees his childhood pet, his great-grandmother, and even says hi to Abraham Lincoln. In the final part of the tour, Peter takes John into an enormous room filled with walls full of clocks. ""Wow"" says John. ""How many clocks are there?"" Peter replies, ""Only the Lord and Mary know."" ""What do they do?"" ""Every time someone lies, their clock turns forward one minute."" John looks around and sees a clock, which is rapidly spinning, on the ceiling. John says, ""Who's clock is that?"" Peter responds ""Oh, that clock belongs to Donald Trump. We use it as a fan.""