I had an idea for a movie plot where a retired CIA agent searches for his kidnapped daughter in Paris, but it turns out that idea was taken. I had another idea for one where the same agent is kidnapped with his wife in Istanbul, but it turns out that one was taken too. I'll leave now.

My grandfather was a WWII vet... He said he went to Paris back in the day, and went into this lounge called ""Les Jardin Rois"" got drunk and pissed on the bar, banged all the waitresses, beat up the bouncer and threw a chair through the front window. Naturally, I went there on vacation one year and tried the same shit, got my ass kicked by a bunch of Parisians and thrown in jail. Calling him from the phone in prison he asked ""Who did you go to that lounge with?"" Taken back by the question, I …

An old WWII veteran was speaking with his grandson and extolling the virtues of being reckless and enjoying life while young. ""When I was your age, I went to Paris with some lads and we had a great time! We had our way with any French women we wanted, pissed on the Eifel tower, and beat the shit out of every Frog that crossed our paths! You have to live it up while you're young!"" So the grandson got some buddies and went to Paris. After thoroughly getting the shit beat out of them for picking …

A german teenager plans a trip to Paris. One day, before the trip, he visits his grandfather, where he mentions his plan. ""Ach, Paris!"" - he replies - ""I've been there once! Wonderful city!"" ""Really? Can you tell me some good places to visit?"" ""Sure I can! There is a small street, more like an alley, right next to the Eiffel Tower. There is this amazing restaurant! The best french dishes are served there. And the best part: it's free for germans!"" ""I never thought that! I must check it …