1. Illiterate? Write today for free help. 2. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again. 3. Our experienced Mom will care for your child. Fenced yard, meals and smacks included. 4. Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. 5. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel. 6. Stock up and save. Limit: one. 7. Semi-annual After-Christmas sale. 8. 3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred. 9. Mixing…

A joke my grandmother, of all people, told me when I was a kid. I don't know how many of y'all have heard this joke, but here it goes. Two guys were at a University of Georgia football game when one of them looks down at the Georgia Bulldog sidelines and sees Uga, the school mascot, licking himself like dogs like to do. The guy smiles, leans over to his buddy while pointing at Uga and says, "Man, I wish I could do that". His friend looks back at him in surprise and says, "Man, that dog would b…

A little boy was spending the weekend with his grandmother who decided to take him to the park. Admiring the beautiful landscape, she remarked: "Doesn't it look like an artist painted this scenery? Did you know God painted this just for you?" The boy said: "Yes, God did it, and he did it left-handed." His grandmother was confused. "What makes you say God did this with his left hand?" "Well," said the boy, "we learned at Sunday School last week that Jesus sits on God's right hand!" Three Good Arg…

Me: Hello Teacher: Hello M: How's my kid doing in school? T: How's my kid doing in school? I hate parrot teacher conferences