If the voting recount flips the outcome of the election, I have the perfect guy to call Trump and tell him that he's no longer going to be President... Steve Harvey. ""I have to apologize.....the 1st runner-up, is Trump. The next President of the United States is...Hillary Clinton!"" *DEEP INHALE* ""***WRONG***""

A joke we tell tourists in china Back when the Terra-cotta Soldiers were discovered, Bill and Hilary Clinton decided to visit the site. It was also asked of the chinese officials arranging the tour, that the Clintons could meet the meek and old chinese man that discovered the Terra-cotta. Back then, the Terra-cotta site was out in the province in a small local village. This village was the hometown of the fortunate old chinese man who discovered them and was going to meet POTUS. It also meant …

Running for president It's the end of the 2016 Presidential race and the United States hated all the candidates so much that nobody voted. The government is in a panic trying to figure out what to do to decide who the next president will be. Finally, Obama comes up with an idea: A Literal Presidential Race. The three candidates would run a lap around the White House and the person with the best time would become president. Sanders goes first, but being as old as he is, he takes about …

What do you call a debate club that only meets once a year? The United States Congress.