Second Nun Jokes

Three nuns are in a hefty discussion about what it is that men have between their legs. The first says: ""I've been told that they have a hump of flesh there"" ""No, no, no, that can't be"" says the second, ""My mother always told me they have a stick there"" ""Ah, you are both ignorant"", replies the third, ""men definitely have a little bird down there"" One day brother Fransiscus is visiting from another monastery and the nuns decide to put their theories to the test. The first nun walks up, …

Judgment day of 3 nuns 3 nuns die and go to afterlife for judgment. The angel who is supposed to judge them points out the holy water and says: ""You'll be allowed to enter to heaven if you wash the body parts you have sinned with using this holy water."" The nuns get into a row in front of the holy water. First nun goes and washes her hands then leaves. Just before second nun uses the holy water, third nun rushes up and gargles. Angel gets curious and asks why she did that. Third nun answers: "…

Two more nuns Two nuns in a bath. First one says ""where's the soap?"" Second nun says ""yeah, it does doesn't it.""

A bus full of nuns crashes... A bus full of nuns crashes and kills everyone inside. Now their spirits are all in line waiting to get into heaven. At the front of the line there is an angel who let's them in. as the first nun in line approaches the angel, he says ""do you have any sins to confess before I let you into heaven?"" the nun replies ""no"", she gets in. The second nun gets to the angel and he asks again ""do you have any sins to confess before I let you into heaven?"" she answers ""Umm…

Three nuns are walking through a park A man in a trench coat walks up and flashes them. Such was the shock that the first nun had a stroke, then the second nun had a stroke but the third nun just couldn't bring herself to touch it.

So there are three nuns walking down the street and a streaker runs by... The first nun has a stroke, the second nun has a stroke, but the third, the third nun doesn't touch him.

Three nuns die and go to heaven... ...where St. Peter greets them and informs them that in order to get into heaven, they must answer a question apeice. The first nun, who happens to be a novice nun, goes first. ""For you,"" says Peter, ""an easy question, because of your short time as a nun. Who were the first two people?"" ""That's easy,"" replies the nun excitedly. ""Adam and Eve."" ""Congratulations,"" says Peter, ""You're in."" He beckons the second nun forward. The second nun has been with…

Three nuns are sitting on a park bench... ...when a man in a trenchcoat walks up and flashes them. The first nun has a stroke. The second nun has a stroke. The third nun couldn't reach.

Two nuns on a bike ride in Philadelphia Two nuns are on a bide ride through Philadelphia, the first nun says to the second, "Make a right turn here, I know a short cut". After a few minutes the second nun says, "I've never come this way before". The first replies, "I know, it's the cobblestones"

Two Irish nuns are on a boat to the US... Two Irish nuns are on a boat to the US, when the first nun says, "You know, I've heard they eat dogs in America." "I've heard the same thing," says the second. After some discussion, the two nuns decide that they will try some dog in order to start immersing themselves in American cultural customs. When they get off the boat, they find their way to a hot dog stand on the corner, ask for two dogs, and sit down to eat this new food. The first nun unwr…

2 nuns take a shortcut 2 nuns are riding bicycles through the Vatican and they decide to take a shortcut down a cobblestone street. The first nun says to the second, "I've never come this way before." The second nun replies to the first, "Nor have I. It must be the cobblestones."

Three nuns are sitting in the park... ...when a man comes up and flashes them. The first nun has a second stroke, the second nun has a stroke, but the third couldn't quite reach it.

Three nuns die and get to the gate of heaven... ..guarded by st. Petrus. He says: in order to enter the gates of heaven, each of you have to answer a question to prove your knowledge about the holy father and his reign. So he asks the first nun: who was he first man on earth? She answers: oh, that's an easy one! It was adam. And the angels sing and the doors open and she enters into heaven. So st. Petrus asks the second nun: who was the first woman on earth? She answers: oh, thats an easy on…

Three nuns died... ...and found themselves standing before St. Peter at the gates of heaven. "Before I can let you in," said Peter, "you'll each have to answer one question." The first nun stepped forward and Peter asked, "What was the name of the first man?" "Adam," answered the nun. And immediately bells began ringing and lights started flashing, and the gates opened up and she entered into heaven. The second nun stepped forward. "What was the name of the first woman?" St. Peter asked.…

2 nuns were smoking when it started to rain... The first nun takes out a condom and cuts off the end and slides it over her cigarette and continues smoking. The second nun notices that it is keeping the first nuns cigarette dry and asks "where'd you get that?" "From the Pharmacy" replied the first nun. So the second nun heads down to the pharmacy and asks the clerk for a pack of condoms. "What size do you need" asked the clerk. The nun replied - "Large enough to fit a Camel"

Heard this at bible camp some years ago Three nuns are praying to God one day, and God actually answers back. He says "I'm going to ask each of you a question and if you answer correctly you will go to heaven." So he asks the first nun, "who was the first man on earth?" She thinks for a minute and answers, "Adam." Bells and chimes ring and she goes up to heaven. Then he asks the second nun, "who was the first woman on earth?" She thinks for minute and answers, "Eve." Bells and chimes ring and s…

Three Nuns cross the road... They get hit by a bus, die and go to heaven. They reach the pearly gates and St. Peter is there waiting for them. As they line up, St. Peter says "Right ladies, in order for you to get into heaven you must answer a question each." The Nuns nod and agree. St. Peter turns to the first Nun and asks "Who was the first man on earth?" the first nun replies "That's easy, Adam!" "Correct, collect your wings and halo and come on in" St. Peter turns to the second nun and a…

Three nuns are sitting on a bench when a flasher revealed himself to them. The first nun had a stroke, the second nun had a stroke, and the third nun couldn't reach.

3 nuns are at the pearly gates... St Peter greets them saying "Sisters of the faith! I have some bad news. Due to the current state of the world, there is a lineup to get into heaven. But since you devoted your lives to the Lord, I have a special surprise for you! You all get to go back to Earth until we can get you in past the gates! And the best part is, because you lived a life of sacrifice and poverty, we will let you return as any famous or rich person you want! Isn't that great?!" He loo…

Two nuns were out walking in the woods When two thugs jumped out from behind a bush and started raping the nuns, the first nun started praying to God, asking him to forgive the men as they knew not what they were doing, the second nun turned to the first and told her, yours might not know what he is doing but mine sure does.

Three Nuns die and go to heaven. Three Nuns die and go to heaven, but in order to enter, they must prove their faith by answering one question each. The first nun was asked "Who was the first man on earth?" The nun replies "Obviously it was Adam" The lights flicker, the bells ring and the gates open. The first nun walks through. The second nun was asked "Who was the first woman on earth?" "Easy" says the second nun "It was Eve" The lights flicker, the bells ring and the gates open. The se…

Three Nuns get into Heaven Three nuns had died and were going to Heaven. They gathered at the Pearly Gates and met St. Peter, who said "Congratulations Sisters you have made it to Heaven! Now to get in you must answer a question each" One Nun steps forward and he asks "Who was the first man in Creation?" "Well that would be Adam" she said. Trumpets played, the gates opened, and she walked in. The second Nun steps forward, and he asks "Who was the first Woman?" "Well that would be Eve" she…

3 nuns die and go to heaven 3 nuns die and go to heaven. They meet St. Peter at the golden gates. St. Peter said “You each have to answer 1 question. If the answer is right you can enter heaven and if you answer wrong you go straight to hell.” He calls the first nun and asks “Who did God make first?” Very happily she answers “Oooh that’s an easy one. God made Adam” Trumpets blast, the golden gates open and she walks in. Then St. Peter calls the second nun and asks “Who did God make second?”…

Three nuns are met by a flasher. So three nuns are walking together after morning services, when a pervert in a trenchcoat jumps out of some bushes and flashes them. The first nun, she had a stroke. The second nun also had a stroke. The third nun didn't touch him.

3 nuns 3 nuns die and go to heaven. St Peter meets them and the pearly gates of heaven. He says to the nuns “hello ladies, I know you have lived your lives with a complete devotion to god, but it’s mandatory that I ask you each a question before you can enter”. The nuns all look at each other and then in agreement, they nod their approval. St Peter asks the first nun “Who was the first man ?” “Adam” she replied. Lightning flashes, angels with great golden horns sound, the colors of hea…