First Cowboy Jokes

Cowboy gets bit by a snake on his willie .. 2 Cowboys riding the range stop to pee. While peeing, the first cowboy gets bit by a rattlesnake on his willie. He tells the 2nd cowboy to ride to town & get Doc. Smith. The 2nd cowboy rides to Doc Smith and tells him his friend got bit by a rattlesnake. Doc Smith says he has to delivery a baby right now, so just go back to your friend and suck the venom out. The 2nd cowboy rides back to the first cowboy. The first cowboy said , where is the Doc, w…

3 cowboys get captured by a group of indians... They take them back to their camp. The chief says to them ""We are going to to scalp you and use your skin for a canoe. However, before you die we will grant you one wish as long as its not a weapon and not an escape"" The first cowboy thinks a moment before responding ""I would like to write a letter to my wife"" The indians give him pen and paper and he writes his letter. The second cowboy says ""Im still a virgin, allow me to sleep with one of y…

A cowboy walks out of a bar A second later he come back in mad as hell ""Okay"" he growls ""which one of you sidewindin' hombres went outside an' pained mah horse bright red while I was a-drinkin'?"" Nobody answers, so the cowboy pulls out his six-shooter and yells ""*I said which of you mangy polecats painted mah horse red?!*"" Slowly one cowboy stands up from the bar. He is six feet, nine inches tall and pulls out a gun that looks more like a small canon than a pistol from his holster ""*I don…

Back in the Old West three Texas cowboys were about to be hung for cattle rustling. The lynch mob brought the three men to a tree right at the edge of the Rio Grande. The idea was that when each man had died they'd cut the rope and he'd drop into the river and drift out of sight They put the first cowboy in the noose but he was so sweaty and greasy he slipped out fell in the river and swam to freedom. They tied the noose around the second cowboy's head. He too oozed out of the rope dropped in…

Two cowboys... Two cowboys are riding along when they spot an indian lying on the ground in the distance. The first cowboy turns to the second and says "what the hell do you think he is doing?". The second cowboy turns to him and says "he is listening. You see these here indian fellers put an ear to the ground so they know what is going on for miles around". "No way, you are lying!" responds the first cowboy. So the two cowboys ride up and the second cowboy says "listen to what he says". T…

Two cowboys are out riding... Two cowboys are out riding on a dirt trail when they come across a sheep with its head stuck in a fence. The men stop and the first cowboy jumps off his horse and approaches the sheep. He then proceeds to take his pants off and have his way with the sheep. When he is done, the second cowboy jumps off his horse. "My turn!" he exclaims, and sticks his head in the fence.

Two cowboys had been separated from their horses, their herd, and their fellow cowboys. They hadn't eaten much for two days and they were getting hungry. All of a sudden, the first cowboy saw what looked to be a tree covered in bacon. "A bacon tree!" he shouted, "we're saved!". Both of the cowboy ran to the tree and gazed adoringly and in hunger at the branches. All of a sudden they were surrounded by Indians and shot dead. Turns out it wasn't a bacon tree, it was a ham bush.