Boston Jokes

What is a Lumber-Jack from Massachusetts' favorite drink? A Boston Logger.

What's the difference between white socks and red socks? (Students will most likely answer the color) Then you say, "yes, that's one difference but there's another: The White Sox play in Chicago and the Red Sox play in Boston!

What's the difference between Hitler and the Boston bombers? Only one of those could stop a race.

What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

What has five arms, three legs and a head? The finish line at the Boston Marathon

Where's is Shaq's appearance most terrifying? On a beach near Boston.

Why do they want to relocate the Sistine chapel in Boston? Because it's more than a ceiling

What do a Boston Marathon runner and Jesus have in common? Nails in their hands and feet

Your Mama's So Old her memory is in black & white! 3849. Your Mama's So Old I told her to act her age, and she died! 3850. Your Mama's So Old I asked to see her birth certificate, and she handed me a rock! 3851. Your Mama's So Old she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp! 3852. Your Mama's So Old Jurassic Park brought back memories! 3853. Your Mama's So Old the key on Ben Franklin's kite was to her apartment! 3854. Your Mama's So Old she has all the apostles in her black book! 3855. Your Mama's So …

A University of Georgia student was visiting a Yankee relative in Boston over the holidays. He went to a large party and met a pretty co- ed. He was attempting to start up a conversation with the line, "Where does you go to school?" The coed, of course, was not overly impressed with his grammar or southern drawl, but did answer his question. "Yale," she replied. The Georgia student took a big, deep breath and shouted, "WHERE DOES YOU GO TO SCHOOL??"

How to Know where a Driver is from: One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: New York One hand on wheel, one finger out window: Chicago One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator: Boston One hand on wheel, cradling cell phone,brick on accelerator: California With gun in lap: L.A.

A guy traveling in flight shouts: “I have reached Boston. I have reached Boston.” Air hostess: “B silent.” He then shouts: “I have reached Oston Oston!”