Barrack Obama Jokes

It's the end of the presidential race... ...and all the candidates were so bad nobody voted. Barrack Obama decides to have a 'literal' presidential race. Trump goes first, and gets 13:12. Hillary knows she has to run as fast as she can to beat him. She tramples all the flowers and runs as fast as she can to beat Trump. She comes with a time of 10:11. ""That must be a record!"" She pants Obama replies: ""No, bush did 9:11.""

President Obama is in a race with the previous 4 presidents... George W. Bush, William Clinton, George H. W. Bush, and Ronald Reagon. They are running a mile to see who can get the fastest time. Barrack Obama placed last, with a time of 15:12 George H.W. Bush placed 4th with a time of 13:57 Ronald Reagon placed 3rd with a time of 11:33 William Clinton placed 2nd with a time of 9:57 And Bush did 9:11

Joe, Barrack, and Michele are out for dinner After a long day working at the White House, Obama decides to sit down for dinner with Biden and Michele. Even though he was aware of Biden's peanut allergy, Barrack decides to prank Biden by asking the White House chef to put peanuts in his food. When the food finally comes, Biden is furious. ""Barrack! I've told you many times that I am very allergic to peanuts."" Michelle steps in to defend her husband. ""Calm down Joe! Honest mistakes happen and h…

Barrack Obama won the Olympic Gold Medal Usain Bolt was running for President

What do you call Barrack Obama with a bad spray tan? Orange is the new Barack! edit: Typo on el presidente's name.

If Barrack Obama wrote a book what would it be called? 50 states of gay.

Robot A guy goes into a bar in Louisiana where there's a robot bartender . The robot says, ""What will you have?"" The guy says, ""Whiskey."" The robot brings back his drink and says to the man, ""What's your IQ?"" The guy says, ""168."" The robot then proceeds to talk about physics, space exploration and medical technology. The guy leaves, . . . but he is curious . . . So he goes back into the bar. The robot bartender says, ""What will you have?"" The guy says, ""Whiskey."" Again, the robot bri…

End of the world Scientists predict the end of the world, they say that there will be a huge tsunami on earth in 2 weeks. So presidents of all nations are now on tv to speak about it. It starts with Barrack Obama: "" My fellow americans, you have now 15 days to spend all of your dollars, so just buy some stuff and enjoy while you can"". Vladimir Poutine: ""Mother Russia will be devastated in 2 weeks, and there will be nowhere else to live so i decided that you are now all free to speak and expre…

Mitt Romney is walking through heaven when he runs into Barrack Obama

Obama died joke One day in the future, Barrack Obama has a heart-attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. "I don't know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got a couple of folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves." Ob…

A father was speaking to his lazy son and says, “I'm ashamed of your laziness. Do you know that Barrack Obama walked 5 miles each day to go to school when he was about your age?” The son replied, “Yes and he was President of the U.S.A. when he was around yours!”