It's Christmas and three men die in a fiery wreck. They arrive at the Pearly Gates and are met by Saint Peter. ""Since it's Christmas the anniversary of the birth of our Saviour, to get into heaven you just need to show me some Christmas spirit and you may have eternal peace."" The first guy takes out his keys and shakes them. ""Jingle Bells"" he says. ""Alright."" Says Saint Peter. ""You're in"" The second guy pulls out his lighter and lights it. ""Candle."" he says, ""Yup."" Says Saint Peter. …

Two women are waiting to get into Heaven Both are in their mid-30's with a lot in common. They introduce themselves as Carol and Jill and quickly become good friends. After some time, Jill finally asks the big question. ""So how did you end up here?"" Carol takes some time before she answers. ""Well, I had been married for five years and my husband started to act strange over the past month. I find out that he was cheating on me and since he worked at home, I decided to catch him in the act by c…

My buddy You ever have one of those friends that are just OBSESSED with Star Wars? Yeah, me too. Tim Lehey is his name. Number of years he went to a -con where he met this girl Carol Hu. Now, Carol was a friggin Star Wars nut herself. They'd go on and on about how Lucas was so great and...blah blah blah... Well, they had one hell of a whirlwind romance, and decided to get married. Well, Carol was really proud of her ancestry, and told Tim that she wasn't going to take his name, so they decided t…

Two women meet in heaven... There's these two women meeting for the first time in heaven who's names are Carol and Lydia. Carol leans over and asks Lydia what the cause of her death was. Lydia says, "Well I froze to death. How did you die?" To which Carol replies "I died of a massive heart attack." Very concerned, Lydia asks "What caused the heart attack?" Carol starts then explaining on how she thought her husband was cheating on her. And how she had come home early to catch him in the act but…